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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

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princessnijireiki: bogleech: bogleech: A rare giant hellbender salamander found dead because some hiker’s rock-stacking collapsed on her.I didn’t even know rock stacking was a thing until this year but there are many ways it disrupts the environment. *Ever since it caught on as a form of white hipster “meditation” there are actually so many hikers who stack rocks now as a hobby that it collectively pollutes streams with sediment that the rocks would otherwise be filtering and reduces the populations of countless organisms that grow and nest among said rocks. http://www.wideopenspaces.com/rock-stacking-natural-graffitti-ecological-impact/ https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/stacking-rocks-wilderness-no-good-180955880/ http://www.takepart.com/article/2016/08/25/new-graffiti-national-parks-fight-stone-stackers/ It’s also weird (and by weird, I mean utterly predictable) how when I first saw this hipster rock stacking thing taking off, it was in specific emulation of inuksuit other Native cairn practices as the new wave appropriated meditation flavor of the moment. It was a blip on my radar because I’m not tapped into like… white upper middle class hipster earthy-crunchiness— my dad does earthy-crunchy for a living I lived in the deep woods for three years, so fucking with rocks streams for no reason genuinely feels like the biggest waste of time I can imagine while hiking— and tbh I think I only heard about it bc of the blatant appropriation thing. But it truly is amazing… how with nothing, with nothing, some people still find a way to destroy everything around them. Because they “love nature” insofar as it can be used consumed by them for entertainment, or a brief vacation (in the same way as they “love” the people they steal culture from); but not enough to respect that they are visitors in a living ecosystem that does not exist for their consumption or as their playthings. And so they don’t believe their actions have negative impacts, because that requires enough self awareness to view the world around them as not needing their input, and to view themselves as an invasive or destructive force by way of that uninvited meddling turned hobby. : princessnijireiki: bogleech: bogleech: A rare giant hellbender salamander found dead because some hiker’s rock-stacking collapsed on her.I didn’t even know rock stacking was a thing until this year but there are many ways it disrupts the environment. *Ever since it caught on as a form of white hipster “meditation” there are actually so many hikers who stack rocks now as a hobby that it collectively pollutes streams with sediment that the rocks would otherwise be filtering and reduces the populations of countless organisms that grow and nest among said rocks. http://www.wideopenspaces.com/rock-stacking-natural-graffitti-ecological-impact/ https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/stacking-rocks-wilderness-no-good-180955880/ http://www.takepart.com/article/2016/08/25/new-graffiti-national-parks-fight-stone-stackers/ It’s also weird (and by weird, I mean utterly predictable) how when I first saw this hipster rock stacking thing taking off, it was in specific emulation of inuksuit other Native cairn practices as the new wave appropriated meditation flavor of the moment. It was a blip on my radar because I’m not tapped into like… white upper middle class hipster earthy-crunchiness— my dad does earthy-crunchy for a living I lived in the deep woods for three years, so fucking with rocks streams for no reason genuinely feels like the biggest waste of time I can imagine while hiking— and tbh I think I only heard about it bc of the blatant appropriation thing. But it truly is amazing… how with nothing, with nothing, some people still find a way to destroy everything around them. Because they “love nature” insofar as it can be used consumed by them for entertainment, or a brief vacation (in the same way as they “love” the people they steal culture from); but not enough to respect that they are visitors in a living ecosystem that does not exist for their consumption or as their playthings. And so they don’t believe their actions have negative impacts, because that requires enough self awareness to view the world around them as not needing their input, and to view themselves as an invasive or destructive force by way of that uninvited meddling turned hobby.
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Time to clear out our housing clutter.: ultraviolet-techno-ecology An awful lot of housing clutter relates directly to the lack of community resources for temporary usage of occasional-use tools and supplies. The average kitchen for example contains a lot of appliances which are only used for special occasions, and a sort of Kitchen-Library could easily supply the necessary tool:s as-needed to an entire community without cluttering up everyone's individual homes In other words - Not every household requires access to a power drill every single day, but an awfully large number of households have had to make permanent space for a power drill they bought specifically for those rare days when they have been needed vighnantaka-bard This is a thought I've had in the past as well, it can be extended to many other specialized tools and other items. Even though I tend towards Thoreau-esque self-relianceI think that the general concept of a library can and should be extended much farther. There's a lot of potential yet to be tapped It's not a new idea either, the Haudenosaunee, also known as the Iroquois Confederacy implemented this practice extensively through what we could loosely call in English, "guilds." There are also some Amish communities who have an informal system for borrowing and passing along various building tools Contrary to popular belief, Amish people don't shun all modern technology and many of them today use power tools, albeit ones that are offgrid and meet specific requirements. The trope of barn-raising Amish people isn't very accurate these days, but cooperation, anti-consumption, and humility are still deeply ingrained their worldview Time to clear out our housing clutter.

Time to clear out our housing clutter.

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Current and former American intelligence officials worry that President Trump’s iPhone calls may be intercepted by Chinese spies, as covered by a story in the New York Times. According to the story, the president’s aides warned Trump that calls on his personal iPhone are not secure, and Chinese and Russian spies may be able to listen in. ___ The president has two official iPhones with limited abilities- altered by the National Security Agency for protection, and a third regular iPhone. In the report by the New York Times, an anonymous White House official says Trump has refused to give up his iPhones. ___ Trump commented on the report by the NYT Thursday morning via Twitter, saying it is “so incorrect I do not have time here to correct it. I only use Government Phones, and have only one seldom used government cell phone. Story is soooo wrong!”: U.S, NEWS TRUMP'S IPHONE Oct 25 | American intelligence officials worry that President Trump's personal iPhone could be tapped by foreign adversaries. Current and former American intelligence officials worry that President Trump’s iPhone calls may be intercepted by Chinese spies, as covered by a story in the New York Times. According to the story, the president’s aides warned Trump that calls on his personal iPhone are not secure, and Chinese and Russian spies may be able to listen in. ___ The president has two official iPhones with limited abilities- altered by the National Security Agency for protection, and a third regular iPhone. In the report by the New York Times, an anonymous White House official says Trump has refused to give up his iPhones. ___ Trump commented on the report by the NYT Thursday morning via Twitter, saying it is “so incorrect I do not have time here to correct it. I only use Government Phones, and have only one seldom used government cell phone. Story is soooo wrong!”

Current and former American intelligence officials worry that President Trump’s iPhone calls may be intercepted by Chinese spies, as cove...

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Gotta love college: In Case ef Fire De lot Use Elevator Use Stairs there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was n college, there was a particular class took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning "Look who's late" face, and walks on inside What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like Fuck it and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d" when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP DOING THAT! Gotta love college
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Impressive: in Case et Fire Elevator Use Stairs there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Wel, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here) He looks up from walking and he sees her He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning Look who's late" face, and walks on inside What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like Fuck it and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP DOING THAT! Impressive
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“AND THEN THEY ALL CLAPPED”: In Case et Fire Do lot Use Elevafor Use Stairs there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning Look who's late" face, and walks on inside What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like Fuck it" and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom. He did a double take, started to say "How the held when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP DOING THAT!" “AND THEN THEY ALL CLAPPED”
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I've saved this before, but this time it has a picture!: In Case of Fire Do tet Use Elevator Use Stairs haedia: thewolfofnibu: stahscre4m: there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random slike this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random s in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class i took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning "Look who's late" face, and walks on inside. What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like “Fuck it" and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d-when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP DOING THAT! I've saved this before, but this time it has a picture!
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rockyrz: libertarirynn: siryouarebeingmocked: grumpy-goompa: siryouarebeingmocked: skeleton-jack: cookingwithroxy: siryouarebeingmocked: derpomatic: siryouarebeingmocked: theunnamedstranger: siryouarebeingmocked: theindependentconservative: siryouarebeingmocked: friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt: triggeredmedia: Bad acting and bad characters? other actors in those movies/franchises got shit from trolls too. melissa mccarthy. hayden christiansen. jake lloyd. laura dern. the difference is that all these media outlets didnt declare it a public crises keep reporting on it months after it was news.  in fact, jake lloyd probably got it worse than anyone, being an actual child at the time being traumatized for years because of bullying, but no one cared at the time now it only gets brought up as a tacked on example when talking about those awful modern star wars fans. hes a straight white man. what on earth could explain this? in leslie jones case, she turned it into an internet slap fight drew much more attention to her when before that she was getting no more shit than the other leads. look, we should always separate the actor from their role people who attack an actor personally for a role are scumbags, but stop injecting racism sexism into everything then using it as a shield against actual valid criticism. Not to mention Adam Driver. He’s still getting crapped on. People complained that he was playing a Jewish guy infiltrating the Klan in a historical Spike Lee movie, even though he isn’t Jewish, which is apparently Not Allowed. These are popular franchises. If a fraction of a percent of their fans are knob-ends who harass people, that would seem overwhelming to the person on the receiving end. Not to mention Rey’s a Mary Sure now and everyone called it. You do remember that I disagree with the majority opinion, right? Also, people were calling her a Mary Sue from the first movie. Sometimes based on things that literally didn’t happen, like “being a better pilot than Han”. On a ship she had literally never seen before in her life until she could pilot it BETTER than someone who’s had it forever.That’s bullshit. On a ship she had literally never seen before in her life You mean the ship that she explicitly called “junk”? The one she says she advised against certain modifications for? The one owned by the Quarter Portion guy, who used to be her guardian, as we see in the flashback? How does Rey fly the ship better than Han? Please, I haven’t seen a single piece of evidence for this in over two and a half years, but it’s treated as gospel.  Heck, he didn’t even “have it forever”, he lost it years, maybe decades ago. Better than Han is less important than outflying two Ties on her first attempt. Only due to home ground advantage, vs. two fighters designed mainly for space combat with horrible aerodynamics, and even then, she got Finn’s turret shot. Also, she’s all-but-explicitly shown to be using The Force. The dialogue draws attention to the fact that she’s flying better than she expects. ‘somebody did a thing that is entirely understandable given the context of the prior movies and the actual text of the movie at hand. But for some reason I missed these obvious things so yarrr!’ No I fully accept the explanations for it. I still think it was poorly done and added to Rey’s perception as a Mary Sue who faces no real challenges and succeeds at everything. That there’s an explanation for what she’s doing and how she’s doing it doesn’t change that I and many people think she shouldn’t be doing it in the first place. So, shedloads of people apparently ignored or missed the clear on-screen evidence to complain about this aspect of the movie, but it’s still the movie’s fault that they’re wrong, even when they’re making claims which they could not have reasonably arrived at (EG Rey’s a better pilot than Han.), and the only possible explanation is “fandom misconceptions”? just because she succeeded (lived) doesn’t mean Rey herself experienced these things as ‘easy’. how many movies out there does the hero do something unexpectedly and benefit from the results? like maybe all of them? movies would be boring if characters are powerless the entire time until the exact one moment they need to win. they need to succeed and stumble a little bit along the way. little wins and little losses until the end. if she got her arm cut off, would that remove people’s mary sue label? Thing is, people ignore the actual struggles she went through just because they have a Narrative. She didn’t just beat Kylo, he knocked her out pretty much instantly, and then Fin bought her time, and then she temporarily forced Ben back (IIRC, the book says she tapped into the Dark Side). We don’t even know if he would’ve been able to win if he got up, or even if he could get up. And this was while Kylo was bleeding out from a high-powered weapon, which the movie takes pain to remind us of. But the fanbase acts like Rey apparently beat Ben with one hand tied behind her back, wearing a blindfold, while suffering from some hideous space-combination of Avian Flu and Ebola Zaire. I’m so glad I’m not crazy. I thought I was the only one in the more conservative camp that doesn’t agree that Rey is a Mary Sue. There is lots of in-text explanation for why she excels at certain things as well as the time honored “because the Force“ answer which has applied to a lot of characters besides her. And she absolutely does have struggles even if they are primarily in emotional conflict and wrestling with her untapped strength and insecurities about her origins. These are what make the character. Calling the whole character a Mary Sue because “she fight too good“ is kind of asinine. And don’t get me started on how they bitch about her beating Kylo and forget that he was mortally wounded at the time, and bitch about her knowing something about the Millennium Falcon and mechanical engineering despite the fact that she was A PROFESSIONAL JUNKER and the ship had been on her planet probably most of her life giving her plenty of time to explore it. But yeah pretending that only the minority actors/actresses get harrassed is bullshit. Rey is 100% a Mary Sue. No training yet managed to beat Kylo Ren, flew a ship across space despite no experience, etc. @rockyrz did you read literally one word from the post above you or are you just gonna keep shouting “she’s a Mary Sue!“ and ignore all evidence to the contrary?“Managed to beat Kylo Ren”BECAUSE HE WAS FUCKING MORTALLY WOUNDED.“flew a ship across space”BECAUSE SHE HAD JUST STATED SHE WAS A PILOT.Like seriously it’s fine if you don’t like the movie but you seem kind of dumb if you just straight up ignore the evidence even it’s right in front of your face so you can keep saying the same thing over and over.: Sean T. Collins Follow @theseantcollins weird that the person they went after from Ghostbusters was Leslie Jones. weird that the person they went after from Star Wars was Kelly Marie Tran. what on earth could explain this 5:29 AM 5 Jun 2018 7,482 Retweets 31,087 Likes rockyrz: libertarirynn: siryouarebeingmocked: grumpy-goompa: siryouarebeingmocked: skeleton-jack: cookingwithroxy: siryouarebeingmocked: derpomatic: siryouarebeingmocked: theunnamedstranger: siryouarebeingmocked: theindependentconservative: siryouarebeingmocked: friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt: triggeredmedia: Bad acting and bad characters? other actors in those movies/franchises got shit from trolls too. melissa mccarthy. hayden christiansen. jake lloyd. laura dern. the difference is that all these media outlets didnt declare it a public crises keep reporting on it months after it was news.  in fact, jake lloyd probably got it worse than anyone, being an actual child at the time being traumatized for years because of bullying, but no one cared at the time now it only gets brought up as a tacked on example when talking about those awful modern star wars fans. hes a straight white man. what on earth could explain this? in leslie jones case, she turned it into an internet slap fight drew much more attention to her when before that she was getting no more shit than the other leads. look, we should always separate the actor from their role people who attack an actor personally for a role are scumbags, but stop injecting racism sexism into everything then using it as a shield against actual valid criticism. Not to mention Adam Driver. He’s still getting crapped on. People complained that he was playing a Jewish guy infiltrating the Klan in a historical Spike Lee movie, even though he isn’t Jewish, which is apparently Not Allowed. These are popular franchises. If a fraction of a percent of their fans are knob-ends who harass people, that would seem overwhelming to the person on the receiving end. Not to mention Rey’s a Mary Sure now and everyone called it. You do remember that I disagree with the majority opinion, right? Also, people were calling her a Mary Sue from the first movie. Sometimes based on things that literally didn’t happen, like “being a better pilot than Han”. On a ship she had literally never seen before in her life until she could pilot it BETTER than someone who’s had it forever.That’s bullshit. On a ship she had literally never seen before in her life You mean the ship that she explicitly called “junk”? The one she says she advised against certain modifications for? The one owned by the Quarter Portion guy, who used to be her guardian, as we see in the flashback? How does Rey fly the ship better than Han? Please, I haven’t seen a single piece of evidence for this in over two and a half years, but it’s treated as gospel.  Heck, he didn’t even “have it forever”, he lost it years, maybe decades ago. Better than Han is less important than outflying two Ties on her first attempt. Only due to home ground advantage, vs. two fighters designed mainly for space combat with horrible aerodynamics, and even then, she got Finn’s turret shot. Also, she’s all-but-explicitly shown to be using The Force. The dialogue draws attention to the fact that she’s flying better than she expects. ‘somebody did a thing that is entirely understandable given the context of the prior movies and the actual text of the movie at hand. But for some reason I missed these obvious things so yarrr!’ No I fully accept the explanations for it. I still think it was poorly done and added to Rey’s perception as a Mary Sue who faces no real challenges and succeeds at everything. That there’s an explanation for what she’s doing and how she’s doing it doesn’t change that I and many people think she shouldn’t be doing it in the first place. So, shedloads of people apparently ignored or missed the clear on-screen evidence to complain about this aspect of the movie, but it’s still the movie’s fault that they’re wrong, even when they’re making claims which they could not have reasonably arrived at (EG Rey’s a better pilot than Han.), and the only possible explanation is “fandom misconceptions”? just because she succeeded (lived) doesn’t mean Rey herself experienced these things as ‘easy’. how many movies out there does the hero do something unexpectedly and benefit from the results? like maybe all of them? movies would be boring if characters are powerless the entire time until the exact one moment they need to win. they need to succeed and stumble a little bit along the way. little wins and little losses until the end. if she got her arm cut off, would that remove people’s mary sue label? Thing is, people ignore the actual struggles she went through just because they have a Narrative. She didn’t just beat Kylo, he knocked her out pretty much instantly, and then Fin bought her time, and then she temporarily forced Ben back (IIRC, the book says she tapped into the Dark Side). We don’t even know if he would’ve been able to win if he got up, or even if he could get up. And this was while Kylo was bleeding out from a high-powered weapon, which the movie takes pain to remind us of. But the fanbase acts like Rey apparently beat Ben with one hand tied behind her back, wearing a blindfold, while suffering from some hideous space-combination of Avian Flu and Ebola Zaire. I’m so glad I’m not crazy. I thought I was the only one in the more conservative camp that doesn’t agree that Rey is a Mary Sue. There is lots of in-text explanation for why she excels at certain things as well as the time honored “because the Force“ answer which has applied to a lot of characters besides her. And she absolutely does have struggles even if they are primarily in emotional conflict and wrestling with her untapped strength and insecurities about her origins. These are what make the character. Calling the whole character a Mary Sue because “she fight too good“ is kind of asinine. And don’t get me started on how they bitch about her beating Kylo and forget that he was mortally wounded at the time, and bitch about her knowing something about the Millennium Falcon and mechanical engineering despite the fact that she was A PROFESSIONAL JUNKER and the ship had been on her planet probably most of her life giving her plenty of time to explore it. But yeah pretending that only the minority actors/actresses get harrassed is bullshit. Rey is 100% a Mary Sue. No training yet managed to beat Kylo Ren, flew a ship across space despite no experience, etc. @rockyrz did you read literally one word from the post above you or are you just gonna keep shouting “she’s a Mary Sue!“ and ignore all evidence to the contrary?“Managed to beat Kylo Ren”BECAUSE HE WAS FUCKING MORTALLY WOUNDED.“flew a ship across space”BECAUSE SHE HAD JUST STATED SHE WAS A PILOT.Like seriously it’s fine if you don’t like the movie but you seem kind of dumb if you just straight up ignore the evidence even it’s right in front of your face so you can keep saying the same thing over and over.
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siryouarebeingmocked: grumpy-goompa: siryouarebeingmocked: skeleton-jack: cookingwithroxy: siryouarebeingmocked: derpomatic: siryouarebeingmocked: theunnamedstranger: siryouarebeingmocked: theindependentconservative: siryouarebeingmocked: friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt: triggeredmedia: Bad acting and bad characters? other actors in those movies/franchises got shit from trolls too. melissa mccarthy. hayden christiansen. jake lloyd. laura dern. the difference is that all these media outlets didnt declare it a public crises keep reporting on it months after it was news.  in fact, jake lloyd probably got it worse than anyone, being an actual child at the time being traumatized for years because of bullying, but no one cared at the time now it only gets brought up as a tacked on example when talking about those awful modern star wars fans. hes a straight white man. what on earth could explain this? in leslie jones case, she turned it into an internet slap fight drew much more attention to her when before that she was getting no more shit than the other leads. look, we should always separate the actor from their role people who attack an actor personally for a role are scumbags, but stop injecting racism sexism into everything then using it as a shield against actual valid criticism. Not to mention Adam Driver. He’s still getting crapped on. People complained that he was playing a Jewish guy infiltrating the Klan in a historical Spike Lee movie, even though he isn’t Jewish, which is apparently Not Allowed. These are popular franchises. If a fraction of a percent of their fans are knob-ends who harass people, that would seem overwhelming to the person on the receiving end. Not to mention Rey’s a Mary Sure now and everyone called it. You do remember that I disagree with the majority opinion, right? Also, people were calling her a Mary Sue from the first movie. Sometimes based on things that literally didn’t happen, like “being a better pilot than Han”. On a ship she had literally never seen before in her life until she could pilot it BETTER than someone who’s had it forever.That’s bullshit. On a ship she had literally never seen before in her life You mean the ship that she explicitly called “junk”? The one she says she advised against certain modifications for? The one owned by the Quarter Portion guy, who used to be her guardian, as we see in the flashback? How does Rey fly the ship better than Han? Please, I haven’t seen a single piece of evidence for this in over two and a half years, but it’s treated as gospel.  Heck, he didn’t even “have it forever”, he lost it years, maybe decades ago. Better than Han is less important than outflying two Ties on her first attempt. Only due to home ground advantage, vs. two fighters designed mainly for space combat with horrible aerodynamics, and even then, she got Finn’s turret shot. Also, she’s all-but-explicitly shown to be using The Force. The dialogue draws attention to the fact that she’s flying better than she expects. ‘somebody did a thing that is entirely understandable given the context of the prior movies and the actual text of the movie at hand. But for some reason I missed these obvious things so yarrr!’ No I fully accept the explanations for it. I still think it was poorly done and added to Rey’s perception as a Mary Sue who faces no real challenges and succeeds at everything. That there’s an explanation for what she’s doing and how she’s doing it doesn’t change that I and many people think she shouldn’t be doing it in the first place. So, shedloads of people apparently ignored or missed the clear on-screen evidence to complain about this aspect of the movie, but it’s still the movie’s fault that they’re wrong, even when they’re making claims which they could not have reasonably arrived at (EG Rey’s a better pilot than Han.), and the only possible explanation is “fandom misconceptions”? just because she succeeded (lived) doesn’t mean Rey herself experienced these things as ‘easy’. how many movies out there does the hero do something unexpectedly and benefit from the results? like maybe all of them? movies would be boring if characters are powerless the entire time until the exact one moment they need to win. they need to succeed and stumble a little bit along the way. little wins and little losses until the end. if she got her arm cut off, would that remove people’s mary sue label? Thing is, people ignore the actual struggles she went through just because they have a Narrative. She didn’t just beat Kylo, he knocked her out pretty much instantly, and then Fin bought her time, and then she temporarily forced Ben back (IIRC, the book says she tapped into the Dark Side). We don’t even know if he would’ve been able to win if he got up, or even if he could get up. And this was while Kylo was bleeding out from a high-powered weapon, which the movie takes pain to remind us of. But the fanbase acts like Rey apparently beat Ben with one hand tied behind her back, wearing a blindfold, while suffering from some hideous space-combination of Avian Flu and Ebola Zaire. I’m so glad I’m not crazy. I thought I was the only one in the more conservative camp that doesn’t agree that Rey is a Mary Sue. There is lots of in-text explanation for why she excels at certain things as well as the time honored “because the Force“ answer which has applied to a lot of characters besides her. And she absolutely does have struggles even if they are primarily in emotional conflict and wrestling with her untapped strength and insecurities about her origins. These are what make the character. Calling the whole character a Mary Sue because “she fight too good“ is kind of asinine. And don’t get me started on how they bitch about her beating Kylo and forget that he was mortally wounded at the time, and bitch about her knowing something about the Millennium Falcon and mechanical engineering despite the fact that she was A PROFESSIONAL JUNKER and the ship had been on her planet probably most of her life giving her plenty of time to explore it.But yeah pretending that only the minority actors/actresses get harrassed is bullshit.: Sean T. Collins Follow @theseantcollins weird that the person they went after from Ghostbusters was Leslie Jones. weird that the person they went after from Star Wars was Kelly Marie Tran. what on earth could explain this 5:29 AM 5 Jun 2018 7,482 Retweets 31,087 Likes siryouarebeingmocked: grumpy-goompa: siryouarebeingmocked: skeleton-jack: cookingwithroxy: siryouarebeingmocked: derpomatic: siryouarebeingmocked: theunnamedstranger: siryouarebeingmocked: theindependentconservative: siryouarebeingmocked: friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt: triggeredmedia: Bad acting and bad characters? other actors in those movies/franchises got shit from trolls too. melissa mccarthy. hayden christiansen. jake lloyd. laura dern. the difference is that all these media outlets didnt declare it a public crises keep reporting on it months after it was news.  in fact, jake lloyd probably got it worse than anyone, being an actual child at the time being traumatized for years because of bullying, but no one cared at the time now it only gets brought up as a tacked on example when talking about those awful modern star wars fans. hes a straight white man. what on earth could explain this? in leslie jones case, she turned it into an internet slap fight drew much more attention to her when before that she was getting no more shit than the other leads. look, we should always separate the actor from their role people who attack an actor personally for a role are scumbags, but stop injecting racism sexism into everything then using it as a shield against actual valid criticism. Not to mention Adam Driver. He’s still getting crapped on. People complained that he was playing a Jewish guy infiltrating the Klan in a historical Spike Lee movie, even though he isn’t Jewish, which is apparently Not Allowed. These are popular franchises. If a fraction of a percent of their fans are knob-ends who harass people, that would seem overwhelming to the person on the receiving end. Not to mention Rey’s a Mary Sure now and everyone called it. You do remember that I disagree with the majority opinion, right? Also, people were calling her a Mary Sue from the first movie. Sometimes based on things that literally didn’t happen, like “being a better pilot than Han”. On a ship she had literally never seen before in her life until she could pilot it BETTER than someone who’s had it forever.That’s bullshit. On a ship she had literally never seen before in her life You mean the ship that she explicitly called “junk”? The one she says she advised against certain modifications for? The one owned by the Quarter Portion guy, who used to be her guardian, as we see in the flashback? How does Rey fly the ship better than Han? Please, I haven’t seen a single piece of evidence for this in over two and a half years, but it’s treated as gospel.  Heck, he didn’t even “have it forever”, he lost it years, maybe decades ago. Better than Han is less important than outflying two Ties on her first attempt. Only due to home ground advantage, vs. two fighters designed mainly for space combat with horrible aerodynamics, and even then, she got Finn’s turret shot. Also, she’s all-but-explicitly shown to be using The Force. The dialogue draws attention to the fact that she’s flying better than she expects. ‘somebody did a thing that is entirely understandable given the context of the prior movies and the actual text of the movie at hand. But for some reason I missed these obvious things so yarrr!’ No I fully accept the explanations for it. I still think it was poorly done and added to Rey’s perception as a Mary Sue who faces no real challenges and succeeds at everything. That there’s an explanation for what she’s doing and how she’s doing it doesn’t change that I and many people think she shouldn’t be doing it in the first place. So, shedloads of people apparently ignored or missed the clear on-screen evidence to complain about this aspect of the movie, but it’s still the movie’s fault that they’re wrong, even when they’re making claims which they could not have reasonably arrived at (EG Rey’s a better pilot than Han.), and the only possible explanation is “fandom misconceptions”? just because she succeeded (lived) doesn’t mean Rey herself experienced these things as ‘easy’. how many movies out there does the hero do something unexpectedly and benefit from the results? like maybe all of them? movies would be boring if characters are powerless the entire time until the exact one moment they need to win. they need to succeed and stumble a little bit along the way. little wins and little losses until the end. if she got her arm cut off, would that remove people’s mary sue label? Thing is, people ignore the actual struggles she went through just because they have a Narrative. She didn’t just beat Kylo, he knocked her out pretty much instantly, and then Fin bought her time, and then she temporarily forced Ben back (IIRC, the book says she tapped into the Dark Side). We don’t even know if he would’ve been able to win if he got up, or even if he could get up. And this was while Kylo was bleeding out from a high-powered weapon, which the movie takes pain to remind us of. But the fanbase acts like Rey apparently beat Ben with one hand tied behind her back, wearing a blindfold, while suffering from some hideous space-combination of Avian Flu and Ebola Zaire. I’m so glad I’m not crazy. I thought I was the only one in the more conservative camp that doesn’t agree that Rey is a Mary Sue. There is lots of in-text explanation for why she excels at certain things as well as the time honored “because the Force“ answer which has applied to a lot of characters besides her. And she absolutely does have struggles even if they are primarily in emotional conflict and wrestling with her untapped strength and insecurities about her origins. These are what make the character. Calling the whole character a Mary Sue because “she fight too good“ is kind of asinine. And don’t get me started on how they bitch about her beating Kylo and forget that he was mortally wounded at the time, and bitch about her knowing something about the Millennium Falcon and mechanical engineering despite the fact that she was A PROFESSIONAL JUNKER and the ship had been on her planet probably most of her life giving her plenty of time to explore it.But yeah pretending that only the minority actors/actresses get harrassed is bullshit.
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<p>Wholesome askreddit story via /r/wholesomememes <a href="https://ift.tt/2KDcE4F">https://ift.tt/2KDcE4F</a></p>: What did "that kid" in your school do that will never leave your mind? 12.6k (self.AskReddit) submitted 12 hours ago by je suis_un_negre[+1] 8641 comments (451 new) source share save hide give gold report crosspost hide all child comments sorted by: best you are viewing a single comment's thread view the rest of the comments 4 [-1 voxetpraetereanihill +1] 2013 points 8 hours ago This kid was the trouble maker voted most likely to end up in prison. He tried to fight teachers, bullied people at random, and generally both gave, and got, a hard time. It was my school's first ever computing class, brand new computer lab and all. How this kid, who I'm almost certain was failing, got into the class I don't know He sat next to me. I didn't care - school bullies were low on my list of things to care about. He was quiet. He took notes. He tried. And I watched him get more and more frustrated, because the teacher never responded when he tried to ask questions, never tried to elaborate for him once everyone else understood. A few weeks in, I saw him trying to read my notes during programming practice. I looked at his screen, and saw what he'd done wrong. I slid my notes across, silently tapped the part he needed, and went back to my work. It took me a long time to realise that he was quite smart, but had some kind of learning disability. And for that entire year, if he had questions, he asked me. I have the ability to explain a single concept six different ways, and would quietly do so until he got it. We never spoke a word to each other outside of that classroom, and I've no idea where he is now, but the teacher announced on our final day that the whole class had passed. permalink source embed save save-RES report give gold reply hide child comments <p>Wholesome askreddit story via /r/wholesomememes <a href="https://ift.tt/2KDcE4F">https://ift.tt/2KDcE4F</a></p>

<p>Wholesome askreddit story via /r/wholesomememes <a href="https://ift.tt/2KDcE4F">https://ift.tt/2KDcE4F</a></p>

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<p>Wholesome askreddit story</p>: What did "that kid" in your school do that will never leave your mind? 12.6k (self.AskReddit) submitted 12 hours ago by je suis_un_negre[+1] 8641 comments (451 new) source share save hide give gold report crosspost hide all child comments sorted by: best you are viewing a single comment's thread view the rest of the comments 4 [-1 voxetpraetereanihill +1] 2013 points 8 hours ago This kid was the trouble maker voted most likely to end up in prison. He tried to fight teachers, bullied people at random, and generally both gave, and got, a hard time. It was my school's first ever computing class, brand new computer lab and all. How this kid, who I'm almost certain was failing, got into the class I don't know He sat next to me. I didn't care - school bullies were low on my list of things to care about. He was quiet. He took notes. He tried. And I watched him get more and more frustrated, because the teacher never responded when he tried to ask questions, never tried to elaborate for him once everyone else understood. A few weeks in, I saw him trying to read my notes during programming practice. I looked at his screen, and saw what he'd done wrong. I slid my notes across, silently tapped the part he needed, and went back to my work. It took me a long time to realise that he was quite smart, but had some kind of learning disability. And for that entire year, if he had questions, he asked me. I have the ability to explain a single concept six different ways, and would quietly do so until he got it. We never spoke a word to each other outside of that classroom, and I've no idea where he is now, but the teacher announced on our final day that the whole class had passed. permalink source embed save save-RES report give gold reply hide child comments <p>Wholesome askreddit story</p>

<p>Wholesome askreddit story</p>

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thesilencedmasses: adminover20: radglawr: haedia: thewolfofnibu: stahscre4m: there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn’t the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn’t be counted late. I mean, that’s a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance.  Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning “Look who’s late” face, and walks on inside. What he didn’t know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like “Fuck it” and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom.  He did a double take, started to say “How the hell d—” when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed “STOP DOING THAT!” omfg the amount of fucks college kids don’t give astounds me IVE ONLY SEEN THIS POST IN SCREENSHOTS I LOVE THE IMPLICATION THAT THIS STUDENT HAS A REPUTATION FOR SCALING THE BUILDINGS: In Case of Fire Do lot Use Elevator Use Stairs thesilencedmasses: adminover20: radglawr: haedia: thewolfofnibu: stahscre4m: there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn’t the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn’t be counted late. I mean, that’s a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance.  Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning “Look who’s late” face, and walks on inside. What he didn’t know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like “Fuck it” and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom.  He did a double take, started to say “How the hell d—” when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed “STOP DOING THAT!” omfg the amount of fucks college kids don’t give astounds me IVE ONLY SEEN THIS POST IN SCREENSHOTS I LOVE THE IMPLICATION THAT THIS STUDENT HAS A REPUTATION FOR SCALING THE BUILDINGS
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