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alexdecampi: Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe Bucky’s shirt a low-key nod to @buckykingofmemes, who we adore Previously in Hell: cover image // 01 // 02 // 03 // Xmas // 04 // 05 // 06 // That time the Punisher’s creator gave us a thumbs-up // twitter // insta HOW did I get a shoutout in this A YEAR AGO and never knew about it?? This series is excellent! Look at that drowsy Bucky!: HELI'S KITCHEN MOVME CUB XMAS SPECIAL MUN ou ARE MOST ToUBLESOME FOR A SECURITY GUARD ㄧㄋ EEENH! SORRY, HANS, WRONG GUESS. Wouw You IKE TO ão FOR OUBLE JEOPARTY,WHERE THE SCORES CAN REALLY CHANGE? CWHOA, THESE THINGS ARE REALLY BAD FOR You THEN WHO ARE You? [INDIANA JONES THEME MUSIC PLAYS] WHEWE JUST A FLY IN THE OINTMENT, HANS. ER PSHUU THE MONKEY KLIK TTER WHAT IS IT YOU WANT, MARY? WHAT DO YOU WANT? DO YOU WANT THE MOON? JUST SAY THE WORD AND I'LL THROW A LASSO AROUND T AND PULL IT DOWN HEY. THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD IDEA. I'LL GIVE YOU THE MOON, MARY. I'LL TAKE IT. THEN WHAT, GEORGE? SNIFE WELL, THEN YOU CAN SWALLOWIT AND IT'LL ALL DISSOLVE, SEE. AND THE MOONBEAMS WOULD SHOOT OUT OF YOUR FINGERS AND YOUR TOES AND THE ENDS OF YOUR HAIR... AM I TALKING TOO MUCH? YES! WHY DON'T YOU KISS HER, INSTEAD OF TALKING HER TO DEATH? HKMC is a work of satire by Dave Acosta (@davedrawsgood), Dee Cunniffe (@deezoid) & Alex de Campi (@alexdecampi). All characters (c) Marvel Comics. Next episode: Death Wish. Or maybe Predator. Dunno. No for real, The Thin Man is "clearly" the best Xmas movie. William Powell is a comedy genius. (If you like Nick & Nora, check out My Man Godfrey, another brillant Powell screwball that has the greatest and by greatest we mean most fucked-up- meetcute of all time.) There's a period in one's young adulthood where it's deeply uncool to like A Wonderful Life. Sentimentality! Ugh, gross. Then you get older, and messages of hope seem a lot more necessary than before. Also, Jimmy Stewart is funny as hell. Not just his delivery, but his physical business between lines? #Goals. Stewart has been in a lot of great films Capra's so current it hurt Mr Smith Frex but if you like nors, dig up the under-appreciated Preminger classic, Anatomy of a Murder. Duke Ellington wrote&performed the score! Anyway: Happy Christmas from all of us. You are more important than you know, and more loved than you believe. Things will get better, give it time. alexdecampi: Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe Bucky’s shirt a low-key nod to @buckykingofmemes, who we adore Previously in Hell: cover image // 01 // 02 // 03 // Xmas // 04 // 05 // 06 // That time the Punisher’s creator gave us a thumbs-up // twitter // insta HOW did I get a shoutout in this A YEAR AGO and never knew about it?? This series is excellent! Look at that drowsy Bucky!
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epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You: God created the dog and said: Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said: That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?' So God agreed Then God created the monkey and said: Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this I'll give you a twenty-year life span.' The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?" And God agreed. Then God created the cow and said: You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years. The cow said: That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty? And God agreed again. Thereafter God created humans and said: Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'II give you twenty years." But the human said: Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?' Okay, said God, 'You asked for it." So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you. epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You

epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You

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epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You: God created the dog and said: Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said: That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?' So God agreed Then God created the monkey and said: Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this I'll give you a twenty-year life span.' The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?" And God agreed. Then God created the cow and said: You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years. The cow said: That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty? And God agreed again. Thereafter God created humans and said: Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'II give you twenty years." But the human said: Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?' Okay, said God, 'You asked for it." So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you. epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You

epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You

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Coincidence?: Life Explained... God created the dog and said Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years. The dog said: That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?" So God agreed. Then God created the monkey and said: Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.' The monkey said: Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did? And God agreed Then God created the cow and said: You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years." The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?" And God agreed again. Thereafter God created humans and said: Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, r'lI give you twenty years." But the human said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?" 'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.' So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family.. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone Life has now been explained to you. Coincidence?

Coincidence?

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thes3nator: ad-hominem-sappies: thes3nator: muenzz: its-blackkittenbitches: greezor: kansasjustgotgayer: rootbeergoddess: joshualunacreations: Whitewashing: An American tradition. Hollywood shapes how we are seen and *not* seen. But we don’t have to give them our money and views. Ghost in the Shell and Death Note are more missed opportunities to showcase Asian-American talent. Let’s not watch them. This is both hilarious and depressing I like how Jesus is pouring water and then it turns into wine Goku isn’t even human. Jesus isn’t black Ang was created by an American company it is not America’s fault an Indian director ruined the it.Ghost is a cyborg and isn’t asian, they creator fucking stated this.Goku isn’t human and is based of the monkey king along with superman.Death Note is being done by a Canadian company last I heard and from what I remember just cause it’s based in Japan doesn’t mean it can’t be changed for future adaption.I don’t hear y'all bitching on how Japan ducked Ait live action when the anime is based in Europe with a fucking diverse cast. Gtfo people like you is what makes it hard for Asian Americans, Asians in general, to make it in an American market. Y'all don’t like it? Don’t watch it, don’t spread hate or misinformed shit. The Light Yagami thing is especially hilarious because none of these idiots complained when they made L, a clearly white or asian dude in the anime, black in the Netflix live action movie. They don’t give a fuck about representation, they just hate white people. And that gives me another reason to hate these peoples guts. @muenzz, @aquariusink, @greezor, @its-blackkittenbitches,@rootbeergoddess, @kansasjustgotgayer, @joshualunacreations, come on guys! We don’t need to have another race war over this! There’s a quick and easy solution to all the bickering: We’ll just uses Meeseeks for all acting roles from now on! -S3NATOR Don’t do it s3n if it doesn’t work out they’ll try to kill you You might be right, but then again, look how perfect they’d be for another Watchmen reboot! -S3NATOR : JESUS CHRIST, ANOTHER ONE SO THEY WHITEWASHED Jos LU UNEMPLOYMENT thes3nator: ad-hominem-sappies: thes3nator: muenzz: its-blackkittenbitches: greezor: kansasjustgotgayer: rootbeergoddess: joshualunacreations: Whitewashing: An American tradition. Hollywood shapes how we are seen and *not* seen. But we don’t have to give them our money and views. Ghost in the Shell and Death Note are more missed opportunities to showcase Asian-American talent. Let’s not watch them. This is both hilarious and depressing I like how Jesus is pouring water and then it turns into wine Goku isn’t even human. Jesus isn’t black Ang was created by an American company it is not America’s fault an Indian director ruined the it.Ghost is a cyborg and isn’t asian, they creator fucking stated this.Goku isn’t human and is based of the monkey king along with superman.Death Note is being done by a Canadian company last I heard and from what I remember just cause it’s based in Japan doesn’t mean it can’t be changed for future adaption.I don’t hear y'all bitching on how Japan ducked Ait live action when the anime is based in Europe with a fucking diverse cast. Gtfo people like you is what makes it hard for Asian Americans, Asians in general, to make it in an American market. Y'all don’t like it? Don’t watch it, don’t spread hate or misinformed shit. The Light Yagami thing is especially hilarious because none of these idiots complained when they made L, a clearly white or asian dude in the anime, black in the Netflix live action movie. They don’t give a fuck about representation, they just hate white people. And that gives me another reason to hate these peoples guts. @muenzz, @aquariusink, @greezor, @its-blackkittenbitches,@rootbeergoddess, @kansasjustgotgayer, @joshualunacreations, come on guys! We don’t need to have another race war over this! There’s a quick and easy solution to all the bickering: We’ll just uses Meeseeks for all acting roles from now on! -S3NATOR Don’t do it s3n if it doesn’t work out they’ll try to kill you You might be right, but then again, look how perfect they’d be for another Watchmen reboot! -S3NATOR
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