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Animals, Deer, and Fucking: I HAVE TINY CRUSTACEANS STUCK IN MY GILLS! I'M HUNGRY FOR SEA BUGS! WHITETIP SHARK CLEANER WRASSE I NEED SOMEONE TO CARRY MY POLLEN TO OTHER FLOWERS I NEED NECTAR TO EAT! TICKSEED FLOWERS BUCKEYE BUTTERFLY l'M LOOKING FOR A BIG MEAL, BUT I NEED HELP FINDING A DEER I WANT TO EAT VENISON, BUT I'M TOO SMALL TO HUNT DEER! COMMON RAVEN COYOTE I NEED SOMEONE TO KEEP ANTS FROM EATING MY EGGS! I WANT A HOME WITH A BODYGUARD AND FREE ANT DELIVERY INCLUDED! COLOMBIAN LESSERBLACK TARANTULA DOTTED HUMMING FROG M. TILLERY - CYANEUS.COM /w/Av[ paramud: personal-scientist: draconym: themaishi: draconym: Mutualistic pairs for an “Odd Couples” Valentine’s program at my work. (Why do so many of my big work projects revolve around Valentine’s programs?) Also, by “sea bugs,” I obviously meant “gnathiid isopod larvae.” The himan one is not as good as the rest If you mean the mutualism between humans and honeyguides, I respectfully disagree. Human/honeyguide mutualism is one of the most sophisticated interspecies relationships in the animal kingdom. While humans have domesticated many other animals for their labor, the honeyguide remains entirely wild while electing to partner up with humans. Both humans and honeyguides have each developed specific calls to signal to one another that they are on the hunt, and these calls greatly increase the likelihood of success. According to this paper: The production of this sound increased the probability of being guided by a honeyguide from about 33 to 66% and the overall probability of thus finding a bees’ nest from 17 to 54%, as compared with other animal or human sounds of similar amplitude. That’s fucking bonkers, you guys!!! There are people out there who over the course of human history have created a sound to communicate with birds, and the birds themselves have a Human Call they use to communicate with us. There is no other wild animal you can just make noises at and immediately communicate that you want it to come help you!!! What’s more, many scientists consider this relationship more exploitative on the honeyguide’s end than on our end! That’s unprecedented!! These birds have essentially negotiated a trade deal with humanity!!!! This is the stuff of fantasy movies, except it’s real. Here’s an article from The Guardian about the broader implications of this kind of relationship with wild animals. It’s a good read: Apart from with our gut bacteria, we humans don’t really have any mutualistic relationships with other creatures. There is no special tune that we can sing to magically attract nearby hedgehogs into our gardens to feast on slugs. There will never be a special wink that fishermen can offer otters, encouraging them to catch fish that we might then de-bone for them, in return for some of the catch. The world is poorer for this. OKAY BUT the noise we make at honeyguides is one of my favorite noises there is, and if y’all haven’t heard the “BRRR-HM?” call that hunters use to summon honeyguides you are SERIOUSLY missing out. There’s an audio clip on the Audobon Society’s article about them [link] @metalpaca
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Batman, Bitch, and Click: gotham city by meg INT. WAREHOUSE NIGHT The discordant SCREECH of a wooden chair's being dragged across a concrete floor echoes through the spacious yet deserted warehouse. The tinted lights are dim, some flickering without any discernible pattern. A heavy pair of boots stomp rhythmically as an man makes his way across the room, the chair firmly in his grip. The man, a nameless HENCHMAN type, is who someone with manners would refer to as "burly" or "built." He stops underneath the brightest light in the room, setting the chair down and revealing its occupant. He is wearing a golden "RR" symbol decorating his chest. Despite the sack covering his features, one can still make out his raven hair poking out of the burlap fabric. a uniform of sorts, with black and red details plus HENCHMAN (gruff) Seems like the Batman... is losing his touch RED ROBIN's head twitches underneath the sack. RED ROBIN (muffled) Do I look like Batman to you? The henchman circles the teen like a tiger stalking its prey, if that tiger had one too many antelope dinners. He forces out a deep and planned LAUGH HENCHMAN No, no, no. Much too small, you are Red Robin shifts in his seat. Inaudible muffling can be heard from underneath the sack. HENCHMAN (CONT'D) Shhh, little bird. You must save your breath! Air will get spare quite soon. Henchman LAUGHS again, but this time his voice horribly cracks. He COUGHS quickly, but the damage was done. Red Robin shifts in his seat once more in the following uncomfortable silence. HENCHMAN (CONT'D) So tell me- 2. Henchman tries to restore the tense atmosphere by slipping an obnoxiously sized syringe full of mysterious liquid out of a package hidden in his coat pocket. HENCHMAN (CONT'D) Where is the bat? My employer just wants to... chat. Red Robin drops his head to the side, effectively communicating a "bitch, please" without the spoken word. Henchman menacingly shakes his head as he stalks toward the teen HENCHMAN (CONT'D) I had a feeling you were the dumb robin A voice suddenly cuts through the heavy air. RED HOOD (from above) Damn right! The man drops the syringe in surprise, eliciting CRASH Red Robin perks up at the dialogue, using the hand that was supposedly tied to the splintering wooden chair to lift the sack from his head. a horrid RED ROBIN (yelling) I resent that! More bickering voices start to emerge from the darkened catwalk above the factory floor. The henchman stands stunned SPOILER Hey, don't say that! sensitive. He's ROBIN Weakest Robin, maybe. Getting himself kidnapped by this oaf? Disgraceful RED ROBIN (yelling) We literally planned this! It was your idea! Red Robin starts untying the ropes around his ankles. 3. ROBIN Maybe there's a reason you're always playing kidnapped! RED ROBIN (yelling) Because you guys are jerks? NIGHTWING Hey, I volunteered to be kidnapped this time! BATGIRL Oh, honey. We all know how that would play out. A communal GROAN emits from the batkids as they reminisce on the last time Dick volunteered to play kidnapped. RED HOOD I take it back, Wing's the dumb Robin NIGHTWING OKAY, first of all, not my fault- the fire was The batkids devolve into unintelligible BICKERING. To an outside observer, it would seem as Red Robin is yelling into darkness filled with disembodied voices. Henchman SPUTTERS, unable to form coherent words. HENCHMAN H-hey! You- You can't- ALL BATKIDS (yelling) Shut up! The henchman shuts his gaping mouth with the CLICK of his teeth HENCHΜΑΝ (talking to himself) I 'm not getting out of this, am 1? A pair of white eyes cut through the darkness behind him ΒΑΤΜAΝ No outoftheframework: outoftheframework: so a little fun tidbit about me is that i write screenplays. i challenged myself to write one in fifteen minutes, unedited, and then post it. this is what happened. enjoy? so so so thankful and in awe to the response to this post. I love screenwriting and it would be my pleasure to provide you guys with more high quality work in the future, y’all make me so happy.thank you :)
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Dogs, Target, and Tumblr: ups-dogs:She always has to bring me a stick to play fetch and can’t get enough. No stick to Big, no stick too small. The older one just wants the treats. North IowaThanks Curt

ups-dogs:She always has to bring me a stick to play fetch and can’t get enough. No stick to Big, no stick too small. The older one just want...

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God, Ignorant, and Love: HE WO MAN FE MALE HU MAN PER SON visual-poetry »swofehuperx by richard tipping (+) [vial mitosisisyourtosis men fabricated the idea that they are the default sex to compensate for their biological inferiority and general superfluousness this is not just the natural order this is the language of a patriarchal culture rhysiare Omg no, you are wrong on so many levels and as a linguist this makes me ache something terrible. In my linguistics dass in undergrad, we actually made fun of people who think like you along these lines and for good reason, because you are wholly ignorant and are choosing to spin narratives about things and fields which you know completely nothing about yet pretend you do. 1 She: This word evolved naturally from Old English from seo/heo which were just words to refer to feminine-female people evolving from Proto- Germanic words meaning that/there. He as a word evolved from the same ideas but Proto-Germanic words for thishere, Your idea of patriarchal language further falls apart when you compare this part of English to other Germanic languages, of which English is related, the words in German for he and she are 'er and sie", completely unrelated So it is by clear happenstance, not some patriarchal conspiracy that the words he and "she in English have similar form. 2. Woman: Oh god this one always gets my goat when people go for this one. Man did not used to mean "male", man used to mean humanity/human being, the old words in Old English for male adult person and female adult person were werman and wifman respectively, we can see this relation in words like werewolf and wife as being the remnants of the base "wer- and the base wif-. Woman evolved phonologically from the word wifman by natural processes where the 'f sound dropped and the became lax. Man dropped its wer stem for reasons mostly unknown but I can guarantee have nothing to do with patriarchy because phonological change has no basis in that. 3. Female: Male and Female actually come etymologically from two completely different words. Male comes from Old French masle which meant masculine, while Female came from Old French as well femella which meant young woman. This is another case, just like he and she where the words coincidentally ended up looking similar without having any direct correlation in historical linguistic processes to make them as such 4 Hman: This word etymologically derives from Proto-Indo- European "ghomon which means earthly being as opposed to heavenly being which would refer to gods. You have some small glimmer of hope here in that the word does eventually branch off into the word for man in some languages but this is still too small of a precedent to base any conspiratorial thinking like you are doing off of 5. Person: This one offends me the most, simply because I love the fuck out of Etruscan language and your continued ignorance just irks me at this point. Person derives from persona from Latin which meant the same meaning, which ultimately derived from phersu Etruscan for mask as Etruscans would often have theatre performers use masks to give identity to the performers. So never once did "person have any meaning to do with son So yes, this IS the natural order or language. Please never proselytise your faulty ideology and misandrist thinking within speaking about word origins and morphology again, as unless you actually do fact checking I will school the everloving hell out of you, stay in vour lane. Swofehuper He Man Male Manson
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Time, All The, and All the Time: I got my kitten a play tunnel. It's way too small but she's still grateful.

I got my kitten a play tunnel. It's way too small but she's still grateful.

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