Without
Without

Without

Geeking
Geeking

Geeking

Topping
Topping

Topping

Dont Believe Everything You Read
Dont Believe Everything You Read

Dont Believe Everything You Read

The
The

The

When
When

When

Mixed Signals
Mixed Signals

Mixed Signals

Cant
Cant

Cant

And
And

And

How To Speak British
How To Speak British

How To Speak British

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Ass, Chill, and Dope: <p><a href="http://daryltakahashi.tumblr.com/post/165767145525/libertarirynn-bird-big-simonalkenmayer" class="tumblr_blog">daryltakahashi</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="https://libertarirynn.tumblr.com/post/165747658929/bird-big-simonalkenmayer-xodollfacexo" class="tumblr_blog">libertarirynn</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://bird-big.tumblr.com/post/165738071661/simonalkenmayer-xodollfacexo" class="tumblr_blog">bird-big</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://simonalkenmayer.tumblr.com/post/165737826009/xodollfacexo-dickscentedroses" class="tumblr_blog">simonalkenmayer</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://xodollfacexo.tumblr.com/post/165646618179/dickscentedroses-mainmanblackdynamite" class="tumblr_blog">xodollfacexo</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://dickscentedroses.tumblr.com/post/165629232162/mainmanblackdynamite-thighetician" class="tumblr_blog">dickscentedroses</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://mainmanblackdynamite.tumblr.com/post/165628568911/thighetician-kingjaffejoffer" class="tumblr_blog">mainmanblackdynamite</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://thighetician.tumblr.com/post/165627387975/kingjaffejoffer-fatrolldarksouls" class="tumblr_blog">thighetician</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://kingjaffejoffer.tumblr.com/post/165627291474/fatrolldarksouls-colachampagnedad" class="tumblr_blog">kingjaffejoffer</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://fatrolldarksouls.tumblr.com/post/165626667484/colachampagnedad-kingjaffejoffer" class="tumblr_blog">fatrolldarksouls</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://colachampagnedad.com/post/165624938730/kingjaffejoffer-roundedtaurus" class="tumblr_blog">colachampagnedad</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://kingjaffejoffer.tumblr.com/post/165621493304/roundedtaurus-kingjaffejoffer" class="tumblr_blog">kingjaffejoffer</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://roundedtaurus.tumblr.com/post/165608725006/kingjaffejoffer-coldestttsummerr" class="tumblr_blog">roundedtaurus</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://kingjaffejoffer.tumblr.com/post/165599326879/coldestttsummerr-stimsbian-by" class="tumblr_blog">kingjaffejoffer</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://coldestttsummerr.tumblr.com/post/165573289115/stimsbian-by-massababistro-his-hands" class="tumblr_blog">coldestttsummerr</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://stimsbian.tumblr.com/post/164476125867/by-massababistro" class="tumblr_blog">stimsbian</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>🌬 by massa_babistro 🌬</p></blockquote> <p>his hands ain’t cold?</p> </blockquote> <p>Thats cool and all, but they really could have just used one of these</p> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="312" data-orig-width="540" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/d85fbf6c2b7bbd30e19b9e76b65de721/tumblr_inline_owvamwqHK31rw09tq_540.jpg"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/3abce456226084a1db011bf552e0fa05/tumblr_inline_owwlmimtpw1rw09tq_540.jpg" data-orig-height="312" data-orig-width="540" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/d85fbf6c2b7bbd30e19b9e76b65de721/tumblr_inline_owvamwqHK31rw09tq_540.jpg"/></figure></blockquote> <p>No, because this is a service you get at a bar. It’s nice to have someone do this for you because they know the exact size of the glass/ how much whisky you’re getting. </p> <p>ALSO BELEIVE IT OR NOT YOU PLEBIANS DONT KNOW THAT the truth is that the quality of your ice plays greatly into the way your drink tastes!!!! </p> <p>These guys get the dope ass ice that’s imported and soft that’s meant for carving and it’s c r y s t a l clear.</p> <p>If you’re drinking shitty ice cube molds from bottled/ tap water ur drinking cheap whisky ☕️</p> </blockquote> <p>It’s impossible for me to have rolled my eyes any harder at all of this.</p> <p><br/></p> <p>“BUT THE ICE THAT’S GOING TO BE SUBMERGED IN YOUR DRINK IS CLEAR”</p> </blockquote> <p>“If you’re drinking shitty ice cube molds from bottled/ tap water ur drinking cheap whiskey”</p> <p><br/></p> <h2>so be it, make me the cheapest shit you got im just here to get turnt.</h2> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="280" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/f30108e39084dcd015aee0f89a018e2d/tumblr_inline_owvamwiPBj1rw09tq_540.gif"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/f30108e39084dcd015aee0f89a018e2d/tumblr_inline_owwlmiQxuw1rw09tq_540.gif" data-orig-height="280" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/f30108e39084dcd015aee0f89a018e2d/tumblr_inline_owvamwiPBj1rw09tq_540.gif"/></figure></blockquote> <p>The attitude towards the bartenders labor is what separates the wealthy and cultured from the poor. The rich drink to enjoy alcohol, the poor drink to forget their shitty lives. Either way I prefer my drinks with a show, I dont mind paying more for finely sculpted ice.</p> </blockquote> <p>It keeps getting worse with each reblog </p> </blockquote> <p>Fatrolldarksouls thinks he’s a part of the bourgeois by virtue of getting drunk at the local Benihana resteraunt</p> </blockquote> <p>😂😂😂😂😂</p> </blockquote> <p>LMFAOOOOOO</p> </blockquote> <p>This thread is so incredibly enjoyable </p> </blockquote> <p>Also…take it from someone with enough money to buy these things…</p> <p>It is all complete rubbish.</p> <p>First of all, if you’re drinking an expensive, single barrel, aged whisky, scotch, bourbon, whiskey with ice in it…I will cut your throat and have mine with your blood in it, you tasteless scum. Why? Because that is a hand crafted thing made with time and the effort of generations, and you’ve just watered it down. What’s the matter with you? Do you water down your milk too? Are you an infant?</p> <p>The fact is that water and ice do different hings to these spirits, but you have to know what you’re mucking with. A FEW DROPS of water is all that is required to bring down the strength of the whiskey and open up the aromatics. Secondly, while that giant globe of ice might chill the spirit down swiftly, and water the alcohol content down so that it is more easily imbibed, it fills and flattens the flavor.</p> <p>Secondly, while the water you use to alter whiskey should be pure (mineralogy really does change the flavor) you can make an ice cube from a silicone mold and be just as happy, you complete sod.</p> <p>Thirdly, if you are taking one finger of an Islay and putting it over a giant globe of ice…I will shove the whole thing down your throat. Use a chilled unleaded crystal tumbler or marble ice cubes. If you cannot take the heat of the product, then don’t drink it. Half of the tasting notes come from the spirit evaporating in the mouth. You’d be smarter to try drinking it from a heated glass like cognac, Armagnac, and so on than adding water to it. Allow the spirit to heat and the evaporation of the alcohol to fill the sinus.</p> <p>If you are going to invest money in a hung, know that thing. Be respectful of it. Don’t hire some poor sod to outfit you with a hand cut piece of nouveau riche stupidity that makes you feel like you’re actually sharing in an appropriated tradition. Otherwise someone like myself will turn that hefty shaved ball into a weapon and drink scotch over your corpse.</p> <p>And might I point out, you ridiculous idiots with your flagrant spending designed to distract you from your own mortality and grievous lack of intellect, that these traditions of spirit making all originated in the pot and tower stills of poor farmers and rural chaps. It did not originate in a crystal palace of privilege.</p> <p>You are not refined because you throw good money at a thing and then ruin it with stupidity. You are not wise because you pay someone to destroy your liquor. You are not better than anyone because you drink to enjoy the taste, and oh yes, happen to experience the precise thing for which the distillate was intended. You are no better than any other person, and you have no right to presume that simply because you have seen a gloved ice cube in a Bond film, it makes you classy.</p> <p>You’re a rich idiot. Not a connesieur who knows when to invest in a fine thing.</p> </blockquote> <p>anyone in this thread smoke weed</p> </blockquote> <p>If not y'all should try some to mellow the fuck out.</p> </blockquote> <p>Things are heating up in the alcohol fandom</p> </blockquote> <p>It’s even funnier if you read their bio: </p><blockquote><p>I am a very old monster., or I suppose the correct term is “Anthropophagic cryptid”. Yes, a real one. No, not an artistic creation or a plea for attention. I eat humans. I write about it. And for some reason, people find it amusing. Probably because you’re not quite right in the head. I am not a cannibal; I would never eat my own species. You may call me Simon or Simone if you like; I don’t have a biological sex that I know of, so use whatever pronouns you like. You can expect to see me post regularly about history, food, politics, civil rights, philosophy, some fashion or antiques, and possibly things of a darkly comedic or horrifying bent. I’m not here to amuse you or to prove what I am. I am here to interact and gather data. And possibly make friends with the polite ones, though those are sometimes difficult to find. This Tumblr blog is but one part of my extensive and ongoing social media/publishing experiment to demonstrate how humanity is killing itself with fiction. I can do this, you see, because I exist, but you are desensitized and find me silly, especially here on Tumblr, where the Otherkin run amok. I invite you to read my “about” page to better understand the experiment I am conducting, 
If you have an “ask”, you may pose it anonymously, though if you vex me, there will be consequences. 
I organize most “asks” by reblogging them onto a secondary blog @monstrousfaq, which it may help you to peruse, if you have a question that is likely to have been asked by someone else. My website 
My published works</p></blockquote>

<p><a href="http://daryltakahashi.tumblr.com/post/165767145525/libertarirynn-bird-big-simonalkenmayer" class="tumblr_blog">daryltakahashi</a...

Ass, Chill, and Dope: <p><a href="http://bird-big.tumblr.com/post/165738071661/simonalkenmayer-xodollfacexo" class="tumblr_blog">bird-big</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="https://simonalkenmayer.tumblr.com/post/165737826009/xodollfacexo-dickscentedroses" class="tumblr_blog">simonalkenmayer</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://xodollfacexo.tumblr.com/post/165646618179/dickscentedroses-mainmanblackdynamite" class="tumblr_blog">xodollfacexo</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://dickscentedroses.tumblr.com/post/165629232162/mainmanblackdynamite-thighetician" class="tumblr_blog">dickscentedroses</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://mainmanblackdynamite.tumblr.com/post/165628568911/thighetician-kingjaffejoffer" class="tumblr_blog">mainmanblackdynamite</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://thighetician.tumblr.com/post/165627387975/kingjaffejoffer-fatrolldarksouls" class="tumblr_blog">thighetician</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://kingjaffejoffer.tumblr.com/post/165627291474/fatrolldarksouls-colachampagnedad" class="tumblr_blog">kingjaffejoffer</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://fatrolldarksouls.tumblr.com/post/165626667484/colachampagnedad-kingjaffejoffer" class="tumblr_blog">fatrolldarksouls</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://colachampagnedad.com/post/165624938730/kingjaffejoffer-roundedtaurus" class="tumblr_blog">colachampagnedad</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://kingjaffejoffer.tumblr.com/post/165621493304/roundedtaurus-kingjaffejoffer" class="tumblr_blog">kingjaffejoffer</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://roundedtaurus.tumblr.com/post/165608725006/kingjaffejoffer-coldestttsummerr" class="tumblr_blog">roundedtaurus</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://kingjaffejoffer.tumblr.com/post/165599326879/coldestttsummerr-stimsbian-by" class="tumblr_blog">kingjaffejoffer</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://coldestttsummerr.tumblr.com/post/165573289115/stimsbian-by-massababistro-his-hands" class="tumblr_blog">coldestttsummerr</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://stimsbian.tumblr.com/post/164476125867/by-massababistro" class="tumblr_blog">stimsbian</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>🌬 by massa_babistro 🌬</p></blockquote> <p>his hands ain’t cold?</p> </blockquote> <p>Thats cool and all, but they really could have just used one of these</p> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="312" data-orig-width="540" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ee4b0c0fbd21a44eab5f70284cd1574c/tumblr_inline_ownnwfhEc21qlbkes_540.jpg"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/d85fbf6c2b7bbd30e19b9e76b65de721/tumblr_inline_owvamwqHK31rw09tq_540.jpg" data-orig-height="312" data-orig-width="540" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ee4b0c0fbd21a44eab5f70284cd1574c/tumblr_inline_ownnwfhEc21qlbkes_540.jpg"/></figure></blockquote> <p>No, because this is a service you get at a bar. It’s nice to have someone do this for you because they know the exact size of the glass/ how much whisky you’re getting. </p> <p>ALSO BELEIVE IT OR NOT YOU PLEBIANS DONT KNOW THAT the truth is that the quality of your ice plays greatly into the way your drink tastes!!!! </p> <p>These guys get the dope ass ice that’s imported and soft that’s meant for carving and it’s c r y s t a l clear.</p> <p>If you’re drinking shitty ice cube molds from bottled/ tap water ur drinking cheap whisky ☕️</p> </blockquote> <p>It’s impossible for me to have rolled my eyes any harder at all of this.</p> <p><br/></p> <p>“BUT THE ICE THAT’S GOING TO BE SUBMERGED IN YOUR DRINK IS CLEAR”</p> </blockquote> <p>“If you’re drinking shitty ice cube molds from bottled/ tap water ur drinking cheap whiskey”</p> <p><br/></p> <h2>so be it, make me the cheapest shit you got im just here to get turnt.</h2> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="280" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/f30108e39084dcd015aee0f89a018e2d/tumblr_inline_owp3huiSHH1toptfb_500.gif"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/f30108e39084dcd015aee0f89a018e2d/tumblr_inline_owvamwiPBj1rw09tq_540.gif" data-orig-height="280" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/f30108e39084dcd015aee0f89a018e2d/tumblr_inline_owp3huiSHH1toptfb_500.gif"/></figure></blockquote> <p>The attitude towards the bartenders labor is what separates the wealthy and cultured from the poor. The rich drink to enjoy alcohol, the poor drink to forget their shitty lives. Either way I prefer my drinks with a show, I dont mind paying more for finely sculpted ice.</p> </blockquote> <p>It keeps getting worse with each reblog </p> </blockquote> <p>Fatrolldarksouls thinks he’s a part of the bourgeois by virtue of getting drunk at the local Benihana resteraunt</p> </blockquote> <p>😂😂😂😂😂</p> </blockquote> <p>LMFAOOOOOO</p> </blockquote> <p>This thread is so incredibly enjoyable </p> </blockquote> <p>Also…take it from someone with enough money to buy these things…</p> <p>It is all complete rubbish.</p> <p>First of all, if you’re drinking an expensive, single barrel, aged whisky, scotch, bourbon, whiskey with ice in it…I will cut your throat and have mine with your blood in it, you tasteless scum. Why? Because that is a hand crafted thing made with time and the effort of generations, and you’ve just watered it down. What’s the matter with you? Do you water down your milk too? Are you an infant?</p> <p>The fact is that water and ice do different hings to these spirits, but you have to know what you’re mucking with. A FEW DROPS of water is all that is required to bring down the strength of the whiskey and open up the aromatics. Secondly, while that giant globe of ice might chill the spirit down swiftly, and water the alcohol content down so that it is more easily imbibed, it fills and flattens the flavor.</p> <p>Secondly, while the water you use to alter whiskey should be pure (mineralogy really does change the flavor) you can make an ice cube from a silicone mold and be just as happy, you complete sod.</p> <p>Thirdly, if you are taking one finger of an Islay and putting it over a giant globe of ice…I will shove the whole thing down your throat. Use a chilled unleaded crystal tumbler or marble ice cubes. If you cannot take the heat of the product, then don’t drink it. Half of the tasting notes come from the spirit evaporating in the mouth. You’d be smarter to try drinking it from a heated glass like cognac, Armagnac, and so on than adding water to it. Allow the spirit to heat and the evaporation of the alcohol to fill the sinus.</p> <p>If you are going to invest money in a hung, know that thing. Be respectful of it. Don’t hire some poor sod to outfit you with a hand cut piece of nouveau riche stupidity that makes you feel like you’re actually sharing in an appropriated tradition. Otherwise someone like myself will turn that hefty shaved ball into a weapon and drink scotch over your corpse.</p> <p>And might I point out, you ridiculous idiots with your flagrant spending designed to distract you from your own mortality and grievous lack of intellect, that these traditions of spirit making all originated in the pot and tower stills of poor farmers and rural chaps. It did not originate in a crystal palace of privilege.</p> <p>You are not refined because you throw good money at a thing and then ruin it with stupidity. You are not wise because you pay someone to destroy your liquor. You are not better than anyone because you drink to enjoy the taste, and oh yes, happen to experience the precise thing for which the distillate was intended. You are no better than any other person, and you have no right to presume that simply because you have seen a gloved ice cube in a Bond film, it makes you classy.</p> <p>You’re a rich idiot. Not a connesieur who knows when to invest in a fine thing.</p> </blockquote> <p>anyone in this thread smoke weed</p> </blockquote> <p>If not y'all should try some to mellow the fuck out.</p>

<p><a href="http://bird-big.tumblr.com/post/165738071661/simonalkenmayer-xodollfacexo" class="tumblr_blog">bird-big</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>...

Af, Apparently, and Ass: Mochi being a good pup for the vet So yesterday I hit tennis balls with the big homie and it's like high 87 degrees hot af so we get four games in and take shirts off. We take a quick water break and he turn around for a sec and low key? Homeboy got the above-butt dimples. SOME MEN HAVE ABOVE-BUTT DIMPLES? I AIN'T EEN REMOTELY GAY, BUT STILL...INTERESTING! I WAS STARTLED 😂. Like how u gon just slap one of the sexiest little features a woman can have...on a random ass dude? Like could u imagine if 0.0001% of men just randomly had titties? Not like obese dudes at the pool with titties I done seen that I mean like a regular dude with a set of clean, crisp, hairless, bounteous, glistening titties. Shit would be wild! Like u would bring a dude named Bill in for a interview and Sally the head of HR just gon be like "Bill Johnson is coming in at 1 pm, remind your team please BILL IS SPECIAL." And everyone know what that mean. And Bill walk in wearing brooks brothers suit pants and wing tip shoes and brooks brothers jacket but instead of a white dress shirt and tie he just wearing a Nike sports running bra because DUH that's what men do why u think we wear basketball shorts iss to put our shit on display 🤗. And Bill in the interview just like "yeah after we got acquired by a private equity firm the culture changed and I wish them well but I'm looking to bring my clients here. Hey let's address the elephant in the room, I have boobs lol. They're fucking nice, too. Wanna suck on em? 😎" Now a group of grown men sucking Bill's titties. They ain't even touching PPs it ain't een gay like that they just taking turns respectfully doing a lil suckysuck. Just a lil bit! U feel me? But nah. Men don't have real titties. But apparently a select few of them got above-butt dimples. Interesting!!! ☺️😂😂😂 (📷: Reddit u-luckytattoos)

So yesterday I hit tennis balls with the big homie and it's like high 87 degrees hot af so we get four games in and take shirts off. We take...