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Alive, Animals, and Bad: mithsonian smithchan.com/monsters nake CHANNELmanstersrake 02012 SNUSI Networks LL.C. All rights reserved Smithson legitimatelala: lokiwtf: gallizfrey: anneriawings: siphersaysstuff: honey-andrevolution: sashayed: silvermoon424: poppypicklesticks: billybatsonandjameshowlettsbro: cosmicallycosmopolitan: billybatsonandjameshowlettsbro: james-winston: The Titanoboa, is a 48ft long snake dating from around 60-58million years ago. It had a rib cage 2ft wide, allowing it to eat whole crocodiles, and surrounding the ribcage were muscles so powerful that it could crush a rhino. Titanoboa was so big it couldn’t even spend long amounts of time on land, because the force of gravity acting on it would cause it to suffocate under its own weight. I’m so glad they aren’t around omg me too. I’m scared enough of 26 ft long anacondas. I’m so happy Megalodons, those giant sharks, aren’t alive either Praise natural selection I remember watching Walking with Beasts or something similar, or some British tv show about evolution The subject was something like a 12 foot long water scorpion I was so startled by its sudden appearance and narration that I yelped: “12 fucking feet?!?!  I’m fucking glad it’s extinct!”  Dude, prehistory was home to some fucking TERRIFYING creatures. For some reason, everything back then was enormous and scary. Extinction doesn’t always have to be a bad thing! And Poppy, what you saw was an arthropod known as Pterygotus (it was actually featured in Walking With Monsters). Not only was it as big (or maybe even bigger) than your average human, it had a stinger the size of a lightbulb. REALLY glad that bugger isn’t around anymore. Also, Megalodon deserves to be mention again, because just hearing its name makes me want to never be submerged in water ever again. GOD, I HATE THIS POST. HOW DO WE EVEN KNOW THAT SHIT ISN’T STILL AROUND? LURKING? EVOLVING? WE DON’T. WE DON’T KNOW SHIT ABOUT SHIT DOWN THERE. THE OCEAN IS A PRIMEVAL HELLSCAPE NIGHTMARE AND WE ALL JUST DIP OUR STUPID FRAGILE UNPROTECTED FETUS BODIES AROUND THE EDGES OF IT LIKE THAT’S NORMAL. FUCK THE OCEAN. this is so relevant to my interests  It wasn’t just the predators. North Carolina was once home to giant ground sloths… THAT IS A GODDAMNED LEAF-EATING SLOTH. We’ve got a skeleton of one of these fuckers at the museum downtown, and man, just being NEAR it is unsettling. DON’T FORGET PREHISTORIC WHALES, SOME OF THOSE FUCKERS WERE TERRIFYING AMBULOCETUS WAS AMPHIBIOUS AND PRETTY BADASS BASILOSAURUS WAS THIS GIANT REPTILIAN CETACEAN THAT PROBABLY SWAM LIKE A DUMB EEL BECAUSE OF ITS TINY FLUKES BUT THIS FUCKER WAS 60 FEET LONG AND AT THE TOP OF THE MARINE FOOD CHAIN AND THEN THERE’S MY FAVORITE, ZYGOPHYSETER, WHICH WAS THIS HUGE EARLY SPERM WHALE THAT ATE SHARKS AND OTHER WHALES IT WAS NOTHING BUT TEETH The reason why the animals in the prehistoric times were so big was because there was much more oxygen in the atmosphere if I recall correctly. Because there was so much oxygen and so few carbon gasses, life on earth was able to grow to terrifying lengths and heights, don’t forget how giant the bugs were. I have never seen so much prime nope in a single post *Goes on Tumblr at 5am to help me go back to sleep for a bit longer* *Never sleeps again* Dammit I was born to late for all the fun
Books, Memes, and Gang: magine having to charge your book this post was made bv amazonkindle Greenland or right-whale, he is the best existing authority But Scoresby knew nothing and says nothing of the great sperm whale, compared with which the Greenland whale is almost unworthy mentioning. And here be it said, that the Greenland whale is an usurper upon the throne of the seas, He is not even by any means the largest of the whales. Yet, owing to the long priority of his claims, and the profound ignorance which, till some seventy years back, invested the then fabulous or utterly unknown sperm-whale, and which ignorance to this present day still reigns in all but some few scientific retreats and whale-ports, this usurpation has been every way complete. Reference to nearly all the leviathanic allusions in the great poets of past days, will satisfy you that the Greenland whale, without one rival, was to them the monarch of the seas. But the time has at last come for a new proclamation. This is Charing Cross; hear ye! good people all,-the Greenland whale is deposed, the great sperm whale now reigneth! paper booK gang There are only two books in being which at all pretend to put the living sperm whale before you, and at the same time, in the remotest degree succeed in the attempt. Those books are Beale's and Bennett's; both in their time surgeons to English South-Sea whale-ships, and both exact and reliable men. The original matter touching the sperm whale to be found in their volumes is necessarily small; but so far as it goes, it is of excellent quality, though 25% Locations 2384-94 9444 Home Back before reading it Gang gang

Gang gang

Animals, Beer, and Cats: COLLECTIVE NOUNS FOR ANIMAL GROUPS A congregotion of alligators A nest, army, colony, or swarm of ants A shrewdness or troop of apes A pace, herd, or drove of asses A troop of baboons An exaltation of larks A leap of leopards A pride of lions A lounge of lizards Atiding of magpies A nest of mice A labor of moles A troop or cartload of monkeys A herd of moose A barren, span, or pack of mules A romp of otters A team, yoke, or drove of oxen A parliament of owls A bed of oysters A company or pandemonium of parrots An ostentotion, pride, or muster of peacocks Apod of pelicans A rookery or colony of penguins A bouquet or nye of pheasants A herd or sounder of pigs A sloth or sieuth of bears Afamily or colony of beavers A grist, swarm, nest, or hive of beer A sounder or singular of boars An obstinacy, herd, troop, or gang of buffalo Aflutter of butterflies A wake of buzzards A train, caravan, or flock of camels A herd of caribou A ciowder, cluster, giaring, or pounce of cats An ormy of caterpillars A herd or drove of cattle A brood or peep of chickens A coolition of cheetahs An intrusion of cockroaches A guip of cormorants A bask or fioat of crocodiles A murder of crows A herd of deer A pack of dogs An are, dule, fiight, or pitying of doves A poddiing.fiock, or raft of ducks A convocation or aerie of eagles A bed or sworm of eels A herd or memory of elephants A herd or gang of elk A mob of emus A business of ferrets A charm of finches A school or shoal of fish A stand or fiamboyance of flamingos A swarm, cloud or business of flies A leash, skulk, or troop of foxes An army of frogs A goggle or skein of geese A herd, corps, or tower of giraffes A swarm, cloud, or horde of gnats Aflock, herd, tribe, or trip of goats A troubling of goldfish A band or troop of gorillas A cloud of grasshoppers A coiony of gulls A down or husk of hares A boil, cast, or ketde of hawks A hedge or siege of herons A bloat of hippos A herd or band of horses A mute, brace, or pack of hounds A cockle of hyenas A band, party, or scold of jays A smack or brood of jellyfish A mob, herd, or troop of kangaroos A prickle of porcupines A school or pod of porpoises A coterie of prairie dogs A bevy or covey of quail A nest or warren of rabbits A gaze or nursery of raccoons Arhumba of rattlesnakes An unkindness or conspiracy of ravens A crash or stubbornness of rhinoceroses A building or clamor of rooks A pod, harem, herd, or colony of seals A school, shoal, or shiver of sharks A flock or fold of sheep A bed, knot, den, or nest of snakes A host or ubiquity of sparrows A clutter of spiders A dray or scurry of squirrels A chottering or murmuration of starlings Aflight or gulp of swallows A bevy, herd, or bank of swans A sounder, drift, herd, or drove of swine An ambush or streak of tigers A nest or knot of toads A hover of trout A rofter, doie, or flock of turkeys A bale or turn of turtles A blessing of unicorns A huddie or herd of walruses A coiony, pack, sneak, or gang of weasels A pod, school, mob, or gam of whales Apack or rout of wolves A wisdom of wombats Adescent of woodpeckers A herd, zeal, or cohort of zebras MIA THEMETAPICTURE.COM you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com epicjohndoe: Collective Nouns For Different Animals
Animals, Beer, and Cats: COLLECTIVE NOUNS FOR ANIMAL GROUPS A congregotion of alligators A nest, army, colony, or swarm of ants A shrewdness or troop of apes A pace, herd, or drove of asses A troop of baboons An exaltation of larks A leap of leopards A pride of lions A lounge of lizards Atiding of magpies A nest of mice A labor of moles A troop or cartload of monkeys A herd of moose A barren, span, or pack of mules A romp of otters A team, yoke, or drove of oxen A parliament of owls A bed of oysters A company or pandemonium of parrots An ostentotion, pride, or muster of peacocks Apod of pelicans A rookery or colony of penguins A bouquet or nye of pheasants A herd or sounder of pigs A sloth or sieuth of bears Afamily or colony of beavers A grist, swarm, nest, or hive of beer A sounder or singular of boars An obstinacy, herd, troop, or gang of buffalo Aflutter of butterflies A wake of buzzards A train, caravan, or flock of camels A herd of caribou A ciowder, cluster, giaring, or pounce of cats An ormy of caterpillars A herd or drove of cattle A brood or peep of chickens A coolition of cheetahs An intrusion of cockroaches A guip of cormorants A bask or fioat of crocodiles A murder of crows A herd of deer A pack of dogs An are, dule, fiight, or pitying of doves A poddiing.fiock, or raft of ducks A convocation or aerie of eagles A bed or sworm of eels A herd or memory of elephants A herd or gang of elk A mob of emus A business of ferrets A charm of finches A school or shoal of fish A stand or fiamboyance of flamingos A swarm, cloud or business of flies A leash, skulk, or troop of foxes An army of frogs A goggle or skein of geese A herd, corps, or tower of giraffes A swarm, cloud, or horde of gnats Aflock, herd, tribe, or trip of goats A troubling of goldfish A band or troop of gorillas A cloud of grasshoppers A coiony of gulls A down or husk of hares A boil, cast, or ketde of hawks A hedge or siege of herons A bloat of hippos A herd or band of horses A mute, brace, or pack of hounds A cockle of hyenas A band, party, or scold of jays A smack or brood of jellyfish A mob, herd, or troop of kangaroos A prickle of porcupines A school or pod of porpoises A coterie of prairie dogs A bevy or covey of quail A nest or warren of rabbits A gaze or nursery of raccoons Arhumba of rattlesnakes An unkindness or conspiracy of ravens A crash or stubbornness of rhinoceroses A building or clamor of rooks A pod, harem, herd, or colony of seals A school, shoal, or shiver of sharks A flock or fold of sheep A bed, knot, den, or nest of snakes A host or ubiquity of sparrows A clutter of spiders A dray or scurry of squirrels A chottering or murmuration of starlings Aflight or gulp of swallows A bevy, herd, or bank of swans A sounder, drift, herd, or drove of swine An ambush or streak of tigers A nest or knot of toads A hover of trout A rofter, doie, or flock of turkeys A bale or turn of turtles A blessing of unicorns A huddie or herd of walruses A coiony, pack, sneak, or gang of weasels A pod, school, mob, or gam of whales Apack or rout of wolves A wisdom of wombats Adescent of woodpeckers A herd, zeal, or cohort of zebras MIA THEMETAPICTURE.COM you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com epicjohndoe: Collective Nouns For Different Animals
Being Alone, Animals, and Cute: uristmcdor It occurs to me that as much as "humans are the scary ones" fits sometimes, if you look at it another way, humans might seem like the absurdly fhiendy or I mean, who looked at an elephant, gigantic creature thoroughly capable of killing someone if it has to, and thought Tm gonna ride on that thing And put a human near any canine predator and there's a strong chance of said human yeling PUPPYT and initiating playful interaction with it And what about the people who look at whales, bigger than basically everything else, and decide Tm gonna swim with our splashy danger friends Heck, for all we know, humans might run into the scariest toughest alens out there and say Heck with it. I'm gonna hug 'enm Why' I dunno. I gotta hug 'emm And its ike the first friendly interaction the species has had in forever so suddenly umanity has a bunch of big scary friends Commander, we must update the code of conduct to include the humans Why7 Are they more aggressive than we anticipated? nseems to be the opposite Commander Just this morming a crewman nearly lost their hand when atempting to stroke an unidentified feline on an unknown world Their reaction to the atack was to call the creature a "mean kitty" and vow to win it over. Upon inquiry it seems they bond so readly with creatures outside their species that they have the capacity to feel sympathy for an alen creature they have never seen before simply because it appears distressed I hate to say this commander but we must install a rule to prevent them from endangering their own lives when interacting with the galaxy's fauna 1 see what you mean So be it, from now on no crewman is allowed to touch unknown animals without permission from a superior officer And send a message to supplies about acquiring one of these puppies" so that their desire to touch furred predators can be safely sated Ehehehe I love this. Every time someone adds a short story to my post it gets like 00% cuter and more epic Lets be honest, the humans would ignore the hell outta that rule whenever alone So 1 hear that you've just recruited a human for your ship Yes, #'s the first time that Ive worked with these species, but they come highly recommended Say, you've worked with a few, what tps can you give me? I'd hate to have some kind of cultural misunderstanding f its avoidable The first rule of working with humans is never leave them unsupervised Wait, what? Tm serious Dont do it. Things Happen But wait, I thought that I heard you highly recommended that every crew should have at least one on board? Absolutely, and I stand by that. Humans are excelent innovators, and are psychologically very reslient. If you have a crisis, then a human that has bonded wth your crew properly can be invaluable. Treat your human well and you should get the best out of them as a crew member Their ability to get on with almost any species is legendary But Toks, didn't you just say The trouble is that they will potentially try to bond with anything If you leave them unsupervised, you have no idea what kind of trouble they can get themselves into It was sheer luck that the Fanzorians thought that it was funny that the human picked up the Crown Prince to coo at him Crown Prince Horram, Scourge of Pxia? The very same Surprisingly good sense of humour. But don't even get me started on that one ime with the Dunlip Al-Human wanted to know if they could keep it As a pet A Dunlip? You mean the 3 metre tall apex predators from Jowun? Yup Dont leave your humans unsupervised uh,take that under advisement Senousily Get a supply of safe animals for the humans to bond wilth or they will make their own I mean, they will try to befriend anything they come across anyway but without any permanent pets they can get.. creative Dont even get me started on the time one of them taped a knife to one of our auto-cleaners and named it Stabby Three weeks in and when we finaly caught the wretched thing hailt the humans on crew tried to revolt about us "killing Stabby by removing the knfe How how did you resolve that si Glaxcol made a toy knife out of insulation rubber and strapped that on instead Quite a creative solution, I suppose And that sated the humans? Worse Worse? They thought it was so funny they made a second one, strapped false eyes on spings to both and held mock battles Then decided Stabby and Knfey were in love and now none of them will allow the others to stage ights between them any more So if I supply my Humans with safe bonding pets they will behave better when on other planets? Where do I get safe bonding pets ? Realizing the havoc their species created with their bonding needs, Earth has been kind enough to create an inter galactic pet shop as they call it, the order forms are on the bridge If they get a pet this should prevent any knife welding auto-cleaners? Yes.. You don't sound very reassuring Well. You have to understand that some of what humans find attractive about their pets is actualy what makes them dangerous. Not all of what they consider 'safe is what we would consider 'safe OK..I am getting a little nervous about this No, no its fine, I'm just saying you should maybe keep an eye on what they order Ask them to describe the creature before they get t For example, the first time I had a human on board I let them order a pet without checking what it was What happened? Well, when it arrived it was a 25 pound fanged and clawed feline creature called a Savannah Cat. My enire crew was temified of it, it was agle and could easily have seriously injured someone, but the human had no fear of it. They insisted on carrying it around like a child, and they would squeeze its beans' as they said, forcing the creatures claws out, and then they would show people it's deady claws while saying, and I quote. look at its adorable claws, this is what it uses to kils things, isnt it Cute? Seriousty? I have also heard stories from other crews that their humans ordered canines that weigh as much or more then they do, and they sleep next to the giant creature You are not making me feel better with these stories everythingtromdust Source radioactivepeasant 28,157 notes Jan 11h 2017 HFY

HFY

Animals, Beer, and Cats: COLLECTIVE NOUNS FOR ANIMAL GROUPS A congregotion of alligators A nest, army, colony, or swarm of ants A shrewdness or troop of apes A pace, herd, or drove of asses A troop of baboons An exaltation of larks A leap of leopards A pride of lions A lounge of lizards Atiding of magpies A nest of mice A labor of moles A troop or cartload of monkeys A herd of moose A barren, span, or pack of mules A romp of otters A team, yoke, or drove of oxen A parliament of owls A bed of oysters A company or pandemonium of parrots An ostentotion, pride, or muster of peacocks Apod of pelicans A rookery or colony of penguins A bouquet or nye of pheasants A herd or sounder of pigs A sloth or sieuth of bears Afamily or colony of beavers A grist, swarm, nest, or hive of beer A sounder or singular of boars An obstinacy, herd, troop, or gang of buffalo Aflutter of butterflies A wake of buzzards A train, caravan, or flock of camels A herd of caribou A ciowder, cluster, giaring, or pounce of cats An ormy of caterpillars A herd or drove of cattle A brood or peep of chickens A coolition of cheetahs An intrusion of cockroaches A guip of cormorants A bask or fioat of crocodiles A murder of crows A herd of deer A pack of dogs An are, dule, fiight, or pitying of doves A poddiing.fiock, or raft of ducks A convocation or aerie of eagles A bed or sworm of eels A herd or memory of elephants A herd or gang of elk A mob of emus A business of ferrets A charm of finches A school or shoal of fish A stand or fiamboyance of flamingos A swarm, cloud or business of flies A leash, skulk, or troop of foxes An army of frogs A goggle or skein of geese A herd, corps, or tower of giraffes A swarm, cloud, or horde of gnats Aflock, herd, tribe, or trip of goats A troubling of goldfish A band or troop of gorillas A cloud of grasshoppers A coiony of gulls A down or husk of hares A boil, cast, or ketde of hawks A hedge or siege of herons A bloat of hippos A herd or band of horses A mute, brace, or pack of hounds A cockle of hyenas A band, party, or scold of jays A smack or brood of jellyfish A mob, herd, or troop of kangaroos A prickle of porcupines A school or pod of porpoises A coterie of prairie dogs A bevy or covey of quail A nest or warren of rabbits A gaze or nursery of raccoons Arhumba of rattlesnakes An unkindness or conspiracy of ravens A crash or stubbornness of rhinoceroses A building or clamor of rooks A pod, harem, herd, or colony of seals A school, shoal, or shiver of sharks A flock or fold of sheep A bed, knot, den, or nest of snakes A host or ubiquity of sparrows A clutter of spiders A dray or scurry of squirrels A chottering or murmuration of starlings Aflight or gulp of swallows A bevy, herd, or bank of swans A sounder, drift, herd, or drove of swine An ambush or streak of tigers A nest or knot of toads A hover of trout A rofter, doie, or flock of turkeys A bale or turn of turtles A blessing of unicorns A huddie or herd of walruses A coiony, pack, sneak, or gang of weasels A pod, school, mob, or gam of whales Apack or rout of wolves A wisdom of wombats Adescent of woodpeckers A herd, zeal, or cohort of zebras MIA THEMETAPICTURE.COM you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com epicjohndoe: Collective Nouns For Different Animals