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Bad, Family, and Phone: 2 When my grandfather was young he owned a roadside motel, and my mother used to do work around the motel for the family. The building was old and they had bad pipes, so visits from the plumber were a fairly regular occurrence over there At one point they had a clogged toilet after a guest checked out, so they called the plumber to come and clean it out. The plumber came in with his bag of gear and set to work, but the clog was stubborn After a few tries, he decided he needed to get the snake I don't know if you've ever seen a serious plumbing snake, but the big ones are a sight to behold. This isn't a little crank auger, it's a full-on electrical powered snake with a big motor on the back and a little grabby claw on the end So he fires up the snake and sends the metal coil down into the pipes with the claw closed, figuring whatever's down there he'll just bump it a bit, push it down the pipes until it clears - but this doesn't happen either. Finally, in frustration, he twists the control to open the mechanical claw at the end of the coil, closes it on something, throws the motor in reverse and starts to pull it back up By now a couple of members of the staff have gathered in the room to try and tigure out what the hell got flushed down the toilet that this giant machine couldn't remove. The motor is really straining you know that sound an electric motor makes when it's working really hard? The whole machine is struggling to pull whatever this is back up through the pipes and into the roonm Finally, after an extended wait, the object is slowly dragged, sopping wet, out of the toilet bowl - and it's a shower curtain, The staff is dumbfounded. They're trying to figure out how this could have happened. It would be weird enough if the guest had ripped the shower curtain down and flushed it down the toilet, but the shower curtain in the room is still there. It would be even weirder if the guest had brought their own shower curtain to the motel and tried to flush it down the toilet, but it's clearly one of their shower curtains. Did they try and steal the shower curtain, leave with it, then feel guilty and come back only to find that the shower curtain had already been replaced, and then flush the shower curtain down the toilet to hide the evidence? While they're discussing this, the room phone rings The person on the other end is screaming, hysterical, so it takes a few minutes for them to figure out that it's the housekeeper who was cleaning the rooms. After a few moments, the manage to get the story out of her: The snake had missed the clog entirely. Rather than spiraling down into the plumbing where it was intended to go, it had wound its way into the central line, and then back up the pipes in the room next door. It spiraled its way up, out the toilet bowl, and then started flailing wildly around the next-door bathroom like a Lovecraftian nightmare made of steel, knocking things off of shelves and clattering furiously around the room. Then, while the hapless housekeeper watched in horror, a metal claw opened on the end of it and snagged the shower curtain, ripped it off the bar ring-by-ring, spun it around the room until it was coiled tightly around the cable, and dragged it back down into the toilet bowl The actual clog was never found 10980 Because a shower curtain would really go through the pipes like that

Because a shower curtain would really go through the pipes like that

Anaconda, Bones, and Disappointed: NEAM 1 saved 15% or more on car insurance by switching my gender self.alberta Submitted 14 hours ago by Anotherlink421 That's right, I changed my gender for cheaper auto-insurance. Proof: Before I get into this, don't try to distinguish the words "gender" and "sex." Having gone through this process, it seems they are the same thing, at least, to the Government of Alberta Mov ing on I saved more like 25%. I'm in my early twenty's, I live in Alberta, Canada; I just bought a new car. when financing a new vehicle, it's required that you must have full insurance coverage on it (includes collision insurance). So I get a quote from my insurance company. I've had a minor collision, and a couple speeding tickets. How much for my auto insurance?: $4517. I was disappointed to say the least and this was after we did everything to bring the premium down. So I ask "Out of curiosity, how much would my premium be if I was a woman?" The broker comes back with a quote of $3423. Holy fuck. $4517-$3423 $1094 I was shocked. I was thinking it would be, you know, $50 to $150 difference. Nope! Over a $1000 difference annually. 1100 bones! The broker says, "Oh it's not just us who discriminate, t's all insurance companies." I said, "yeah I know, thats actually worse." The broker explains to me that it is illegal to discriminate on the basis of gender when it comes to basic auto-insurance. When it comes to collision, however, it's still legal to discriminate against genders on the basis of contrast in driving-statistics. So I began asking more questions and digging deeper into what would happen to my auto-policy if I did change my gender. The broker assured me they would re-adjust my auto-policy on the day my gender changed. Right then and there I was determined to change my gender To change my gender on my auto-policy I needed to change my gender on my Driver's License. To change my gender on my driver's license I first needed to amend it on my birth certificate. So I called the Governme Alberta and they said they'd send me the forms to get the process started. After that she said they will send me another batch of forms which included a requirement being a physician must write a letter saying that I am a woman. I thought I was stopped right there. I don't want surgery! I thought gender was a state of mind in Canada and Alberta now. I was let down, but thankfully I was mistaken. Gender is a state of mind in Canada and therefore Alberta. I approached this sub in a post telling you guys how my shortly lived endeavor came to an abrupt end. I thought having to see a physician implied I had to have surgery. Silly me /s. The folks over at r/Mensrights directed me to a video of Lauren Southern (also Canadian) doing the exact same thing. r/Mensrights sub further convinced me that doctors are obligated to write me the letter I want. It's dumb: they are medical doctors, not psychologists As the form stated, I was allowed to change my Sex if my gender didn't match my body. Doesn't make much sense But whatever. I followed the requirements: one being the doctor's letter, and two getting an affidavit notarized. The whole process was easy. Overall, it costed me $100 to change my gender I am now a woman. I wasn't one last year. As you could see, I received my new birth certificate that states I am officially a woman. After I changed my gender on my driver's license (and also my Alberta Health care coincidentally) I called up my insurance company and they adjusted my rate. I now pay $1100 less for auto- insurance. I won. The end This person saved 15% on car insurance without switching to Geico.

This person saved 15% on car insurance without switching to Geico.

Big Dick, Chill, and Church: ITT: Glorious Retards >be me mormonfag church boring as fuck not really that interested in going, its a cult, mostly do it for my family hate testimony week basically open mic day once a week at church people go up and are supposed to talk about how great god is or whatever, generally just talk about how great they are and what vacation they went on last literally just a big dick measuring contest new family moves into ward pretty unusual situation: single dad, downie kid. we learned way later that he accidentally got a girl pregnant, she wanted to abort downie, he said he'd raise the baby himself rather than see that happen. not sure if i agree with it, but gotta admit, that's honorable as fuck downies a good kid too, sweet as can be, not as dumb as you'd think anyway testimony week comes around, dreading it first guy goes up, starts talking about how he baptized a lot of people on his mission >am rolling my eyes in five dimensions when I heard downie roar from across the room "TEHTIMONEY WEEK IS FOHR TEHTIMONEYS! NOE!" room goes quiet, guy wraps up quickly, sits down people tell actual wholesome stuff, they fear the downie. no dick measuring with him around next week similar thing happens: woman goes up to talk about how much she loves her husband, and how he took the whole family on a trip to mexico recently Downie interrupts "TEHTIMONEY! WEEK! IS! FOHR! TEHTIMONEYS! NOE!" lady sits down, normal talking goes on, im officially borderline gay for downie later talking with my edgelord apostate friends, we all talk about how downie is the best thing to happen to this ward ever we find downie and thank him for keeping it real. his dad is super touched that we all stopped by, we all make sure to thank downie for his interruptions and tell him to keep it real we thought maybe his dad would be annoyed that we were encouraging this, but his dad was chill as could be 6.5 kB JPG 33 min. ago. Anonymous | 44806137 cont next week, Downey takes it up a notclh mormon services have two or three talks a servic, all done by volunteers, but the talks can suuuuuuck worst ones are when old people/newly returned missionaries are asked to talk and they ramble for an hour and a half old lady is going on and on about growing up in the great depression. we're all about to go insane when downie stands up YOU TAHK TOO LON, OTHER SPEACHERS NEED TO TAHK TOO lady wraps up we're all in fucking awe of this god among us anytime somebody rambles, or tries to humblebrag, downie calls them out its fucking amazing >church is still a cult but its actually kind of fun now with downie there me and my edgelord friends keep an eye on him, nobody fucks with our downie we get near the end of HS when downie has a heart attack we all visit him in the hospital. we fucking love him >he survived the heart attack, but he just may not have a whole lot of time left. the sunday, the dad announces that him and his son are going to be moving out of state. wants to show his son more of the world before he dies. me and my friends go to downies house to say goodbye, tell him we're going to miss him so much, testimoney week is going to turn back to shit with him gone downie asks if he can tell us a secret we say sure, you can tell us anything "Dah tole me wat to say all those times. >mfw his dad originally used his retarded son as a way to ignore social conventions and tell people to stfu, but wound up continuing to do it for years because he knew it was helping him have friends. >mfw when im not sure if his dad is an asshole or a genius >mfw I don't even care anymore, I still think fondly of that glorious downie bastard yelling at old ladies from the back of the chapel 1 REPLY Anon goes to church

Anon goes to church

Facebook, Friday, and Friends: Verizon 23:44 November 28 Las Cruces, NM I got my first ever gun today DC9, post pics of your most favorite firearm or the first gun you've ever had, whatever speaks to you most. PS. I'm a flamboyant liberal queer and my more "right" friends feel like they have converted me and are ecstatic (maaaaybe they're right a bit, it's not likely tho but I'll just let them think that bc I love my friends) Like Comment OWrite a comment... Comments Done l don't feel confidently about you owning a handgun November 28 Like Reply 1 Fio Thats pretty fucked up, I don't know why anyone would feel more confident about you owning one for instance November 28 Like Reply 8 It would be one thing if you said you don't feel confident about anyone owning one. In this case you are very clearly implying that there is something about me which would make it unsafe and that is so incredibly ridiculous I don't know where to begin but I guess first of all, what makes you think that you have the authority to say that someone that passed the background checks to buy a firearm and who immediately registered it and is asking for safety pointers would be unsafe using a gun? I'm fully expecting any answer you have to be completely offensive and inappropriate and based on wild assumptions but please, continue. November 29 Like Reply 12 Write a comment... Post Love Comment Verizon 23:44 cbs4local.com SHARE EMERGENCY ROOM Police: Road rage leads to arrest after woman shoots at another driver by Trisha Garcia Friday, February 9th 2018 ARRESTED LAS CRUCES POLICE DEPARTMENT .5 FION Mug of Fiona Mcharged with one count of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. FACEBOOK TWITTER MAIL TRENDING I can't stop laughing at this.. Scroll to the end.

I can't stop laughing at this.. Scroll to the end.

Apparently, Beautiful, and Confused: Hi Morning Your holiday Monday off to a good start? Monday 09:15 Yes nice what r u looking for on tinder Monday 12:13 Nothing specific. I'm not around for long Monday 18:15 Ok Today 06:20 I feel the hunger on foreign skin, wants to absorb the scent of foreign skin, I want to drill my teeth into your flesh Draw marks on my skin with my nails. I want to feel how you give yourself to me, how you become soft and yielding, deliver you, just feel, just give, until you melt helpless in my arms I want to drink you empty like a sweet fruit, absorb your pain and moans into me Take heat and give it. Playing on your nipples, until your moans penetrate my ear like a beautiful melody. l want to touch, dominate, explore to the last corner of your soul And then start over. Slowly. Persevering. Relish I let your soul slip through my hands, shape and encourage you Protect you. I will kiss your tears away. Find you nice. Over and over again Today 07:49 Today 08:21 ....huh? When was ur last sex Today 09:32 I'm very confused about the turn this conversation has taken I thought you were looking for feedback on your....poetry. Or whatever that was Did u read the poem? I did. Are you looking for constructive feedback? Sent GIF Type a message... I did. Are you looking for constructive feedback? I am lookin for a feedback about what u feel it u like it Well, some of your metaphors are a little off. l'd also look at breaking out the old thesaurus the use of 'foreign skin' twice in two lines and 'moans' twice in one stanza could do with changing up. Also, beginning stanzas 2,3 & 4 with 'l want' is a good device, but you need to carry it through to the rest of the stanzas for it to really be effective Also very unsure on the find you nice' line All together it's a good beginning effort Sent GIF Type a message.. Do u like this type of sex Surely the sex in the poem is a metaphor for death though? It's not intended to be read literally as a sex act Do u read the dominant part? Yes, I want to touch [... last corner of your soul' - death is the ultimate dominator, and through the end of life manages to reach through to the very ends of our souls There is a feeling of rebirth, new life in this stanza though 'and then start over [...] persevering Maybe this is more about loss and finding oneself again than it is about death Sent GIF Type a message.. Do u like domiant men? The world is full of dominant men and it doesn't seem to be working so well for it Sent Type a message GIF .. Apparently not ready for the literary critique

Apparently not ready for the literary critique

Blessed, Crush, and Funny: Ashanti Becomes The Latest Black Female Celebrity To Share Her #MeToo Stories Of Sexual Harassment: "Once l Said 'No,' All Of A Sudden The Track Became $45k" @balleralert Ashanti Becomes The Latest Black Female Celebrity To Share Her MeToo Stories Of Sexual Harassment – “Once I Said ‘No,’ All Of A Sudden The Track Became $45k” – blogged by @MsJennyb ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ As allegations of sexual misconduct and assault continue to spread throughout Hollywood, more women and men, alike, are coming forward to share their experiences. In fact, Ashanti has become the most recent black female celebrity to share her own MeToo story. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The ‘Foolish’ singer spilled the details in an interview on SiriusXM’s “Conversation with Maria Menounos,” as she revealed that she was sexually harassed by a producer, who refused to release her music without an exchange of sexual favors. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “I’ve come across a situation where there was a certain producer that, you know, he had his little crush or whatever, but it wasn’t anything new, you know,” Ashanti said. “And once I said ‘no,’ all of a sudden the track became $45k.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “It’s funny because he said something like, ‘Well just take a shower with me and let me do this,” she continued, as she explained the producer apologized when one of her “big brothers” stepped in. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “The way that apology came in, I actually got three records for free,” Ashanti said. “And I got two of them mixed and mastered for free also.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ However, according to the songstress, not everyone is blessed to have people that look out for them and protect them, when need be. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “I’m blessed because I have that,” she said, as she reflected on her experience. “It happens it does and it’s unfortunate.”

Ashanti Becomes The Latest Black Female Celebrity To Share Her MeToo Stories Of Sexual Harassment – “Once I Said ‘No,’ All Of A Sudden The T...