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Me irl: Paul The Trombonist @JazzTrombonist I accidentally texted my wife with voice recognition...while playing the trombone co0 AT&T Wi-Fi ? 1 80 1* 79% 3:34 PM 000 AT&T Wi-Fi ? 3:36 PM Deta Messages (3) DI Messages (3) Paul Paul Del iMessage Today 3:27 PM (1/5) Woo woo woo woo woo woo woo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo Totally! Ya, that makes sense. Call you woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo w hoo w woop soon Sounds good! (2/5) 00 woo woo woo woo hoo woo perfect hoo who who who who who who wu woo woo woo woop woop woop woop woo woop wah wah waa what wapp whapp woo woo woo we should probably go grocery shopping later (3/5) woop woop wah wah wah woo woo woo wah woo wha waa waa woop woop woop wwop woop woop whap wah wah woh wa wa wa whh woo woo Deliver (1/5) Woo woo woo woo woo woo woo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo (4/5) woop woop wah wah wah waaa woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo w hoo w woop waa waa waa waa waa waa waa woo woo woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop (2/5) 00 woo woo woo woo hoo woo hoo who who who who who who wu woop woop woop woop woop woop woop waa waa waa waa waaaaa waaa woo woo w0o woop woop woop woop woo woop wah wah waa what wapp whapp woo woo woo waaa waa (5/5) woop woop wah wah wah woo woo woo wah woo wha waa waa woop (3/5) woop woop wah wah wah woo woo woo wah woo wha waa waa woop woop woop wwop woop woop whap wah wah woh wa wa wa whh woo woo woop woop wwop woop woop whap woo00 woo won IMessage IMessage ITHE TROMBONILT Me irl

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srsfunny: Very Well Done Domino’s Pizza Tracker: HOW DOMINO'S PIZZA TRACKER SAVED A LIFE This is a story of why dating bipolar girls is not a good idea and how the Domino's Pizza tracker saved my life I have always been on the fence when it comes to Pizza Hut Vs. Dominos. I don't eat enough pizza from either to really have a concrete answer of which one makes a better pie. I can tell you one solid truth... As my last relationship ended and the lies, scandals and deceptions came out, after all was said and done, my psycho ex girlfriend did teach me one VERY important thing ALWAYS choose Domino's over pizza hut. I had been having trouble with my now Ex-girlfriend for quite awhile, I won't go into details, but let's just say she went crazy. I thought, simple: I'Il just break it off Wrong One Friday night, around 8:00pm, after a long week of work and incessant phone calls/psychotic voicemails from the unbalanced EX, I decided I was going to stay in, which one any weekend night is abnormal for me. Usually on weekend nights that I am in, I usually am cool with a movie, a 6 pack and a pizza. I had been ordering from Pizza Hut the last few times, but after a constant bombardment with Domino's WEVE CHANGED OUR SHIT,I SWEAR WE RE AWESOME NOW ad campaign, I decided to give it a shot Around 8pm, I went online to order my pizza I built a modest 2 topping medium pizza, and placed my order. You have to love how far we have come in the delivery pizza world Immediately afterwards, I was introduced to the piece of a software that would save my neck The Pizza Tracker Pizza tracker? Fuck yeah, the pizza tracker. If you don't know what the pizza tracker is, then get your ass online right now and order a pizza from Domino's It's the equivalent of a loading bar on a web browser, except at the end of the loading you get a delicious pizza ORDER MENU COUPONS LOCATIONS TRACKER ESPANO This is where the night got interesting. I am on my couch, one eye on "Parks and Rec the other on the pizza tracker displayed on my lap top that joined me on the couch. We had just entered stage 2. Prep. KNOCKI KNOCKI KNOCK For a split second I thought, "woh that was fast, Iput my order in 10 minutes ago and pizza tracker says it's still in stage 2 By the end of my thought, the door swung open Guess who Yep, it was my psychotic EX. Knife in hand, she starts threatening to do some pretty awful things. I try to stand up, she freaks. I stay on the couch and attempt to calm her down. She goes into a hysterical rant about us getting back together, ya right, and I glance at the pizza tracker Stage 3. Bake (Juan is putting your order in the oven) She goes on while all I can think is GO JUAN GO!!!GET THAT SHIT IN THE OVEN l try to calm her down, I stand up and she freaks out and tells me "SIT THE FUCK DOWN!! She continues on her violet outburst and I tell her we can work things out hoping to get her to calm down. It's no use. I decide I need to try and get to my phone. l inconspicuously try to look for my cell phone. Dammit! I left it my room. I am screwed. I am dead. The pizza man will get blamed for this! Oh, the poor pizza boy will be wrongfully blamed and get life in prison for what this unstable bitch is going to do to me STAGE 41 BOX FUCK YEAH! They are boxing up my pizza. Get your ass over here She continues on for another 5 minutes. Trying to make eye contact, glancing at the pizza tracker every second she looks away Stage 51 DELIVERY Alejandro is delivering your pizza GOD SPEED ALEJENDROIII MY LIFE AND YOUR FREEDOM RELY ON THIS Knowing that the Alejandro is on the way, I try and just keep her talking, but the more she talks the more enraged she gets. I try to interupt, but that just makes things worse It's been 10 minutes, Alejandro should be here any time She continues, she is yelling at the top of her lungs about the things we could have been. I am still banking that Alejandro will be here any second and save the day 10 more minutes go by Alejandro GET YOUR ASS IN GEAR SHE IS OFFICIALLY FREAKING THE FUCK OUT. She puts the knife up to her wrist and then takes it away. I am panicking. Where the fuck is Alejandro! Pizza tracker tells me we're still in stage 5. FUCK YOU PIZZA TRACKER, YOUVE BEEN IN STAGE 5 FOR 25 MINUTES!!!! I will never order from Domino's again!!! After this thought I immediately think to myself, I will be dead, so I will probably never order another pizza again. Right then, the cops come in. At gunpoint they calm her down and obtain the knife. Alejandro had shown up to the door wide open and saw psycho with the knife and went back to his 98 Honda Accord and called the cops. Domino's pizza literally saved my life. They should change the name from the pizza tracker to the savior tracker Alejandro is the true definition of a hero. In a way, Alejandro is the 5th ninja turtle. He showed up, accessed the situation, didnt panic, and saved my ass from the bad guys. Oh yeah, and he brought a fucking excellent pizza too. THIS IS THE MOST AWESOME THING I HAVE EVER READ POWER TO THE PIZZA MA THEMETAPICTURECOM srsfunny: Very Well Done Domino’s Pizza Tracker
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srsfunny:Very Well Done Domino’s Pizza Tracker: HOW DOMINO'S PIZZA TRACKER SAVED A LIFE This is a story of why dating bipolar girls is not a good idea and how the Domino's Pizza tracker saved my life I have always been on the fence when it comes to Pizza Hut Vs. Dominos. I don't eat enough pizza from either to really have a concrete answer of which one makes a better pie. I can tell you one solid truth... As my last relationship ended and the lies, scandals and deceptions came out, after all was said and done, my psycho ex girlfriend did teach me one VERY important thing ALWAYS choose Domino's over pizza hut. I had been having trouble with my now Ex-girlfriend for quite awhile, I won't go into details, but let's just say she went crazy. I thought, simple: I'Il just break it off Wrong One Friday night, around 8:00pm, after a long week of work and incessant phone calls/psychotic voicemails from the unbalanced EX, I decided I was going to stay in, which one any weekend night is abnormal for me. Usually on weekend nights that I am in, I usually am cool with a movie, a 6 pack and a pizza. I had been ordering from Pizza Hut the last few times, but after a constant bombardment with Domino's WEVE CHANGED OUR SHIT,I SWEAR WE RE AWESOME NOW ad campaign, I decided to give it a shot Around 8pm, I went online to order my pizza I built a modest 2 topping medium pizza, and placed my order. You have to love how far we have come in the delivery pizza world Immediately afterwards, I was introduced to the piece of a software that would save my neck The Pizza Tracker Pizza tracker? Fuck yeah, the pizza tracker. If you don't know what the pizza tracker is, then get your ass online right now and order a pizza from Domino's It's the equivalent of a loading bar on a web browser, except at the end of the loading you get a delicious pizza ORDER MENU COUPONS LOCATIONS TRACKER ESPANO This is where the night got interesting. I am on my couch, one eye on "Parks and Rec the other on the pizza tracker displayed on my lap top that joined me on the couch. We had just entered stage 2. Prep. KNOCKI KNOCKI KNOCK For a split second I thought, "woh that was fast, Iput my order in 10 minutes ago and pizza tracker says it's still in stage 2 By the end of my thought, the door swung open Guess who Yep, it was my psychotic EX. Knife in hand, she starts threatening to do some pretty awful things. I try to stand up, she freaks. I stay on the couch and attempt to calm her down. She goes into a hysterical rant about us getting back together, ya right, and I glance at the pizza tracker Stage 3. Bake (Juan is putting your order in the oven) She goes on while all I can think is GO JUAN GO!!!GET THAT SHIT IN THE OVEN l try to calm her down, I stand up and she freaks out and tells me "SIT THE FUCK DOWN!! She continues on her violet outburst and I tell her we can work things out hoping to get her to calm down. It's no use. I decide I need to try and get to my phone. l inconspicuously try to look for my cell phone. Dammit! I left it my room. I am screwed. I am dead. The pizza man will get blamed for this! Oh, the poor pizza boy will be wrongfully blamed and get life in prison for what this unstable bitch is going to do to me STAGE 41 BOX FUCK YEAH! They are boxing up my pizza. Get your ass over here She continues on for another 5 minutes. Trying to make eye contact, glancing at the pizza tracker every second she looks away Stage 51 DELIVERY Alejandro is delivering your pizza GOD SPEED ALEJENDROIII MY LIFE AND YOUR FREEDOM RELY ON THIS Knowing that the Alejandro is on the way, I try and just keep her talking, but the more she talks the more enraged she gets. I try to interupt, but that just makes things worse It's been 10 minutes, Alejandro should be here any time She continues, she is yelling at the top of her lungs about the things we could have been. I am still banking that Alejandro will be here any second and save the day 10 more minutes go by Alejandro GET YOUR ASS IN GEAR SHE IS OFFICIALLY FREAKING THE FUCK OUT. She puts the knife up to her wrist and then takes it away. I am panicking. Where the fuck is Alejandro! Pizza tracker tells me we're still in stage 5. FUCK YOU PIZZA TRACKER, YOUVE BEEN IN STAGE 5 FOR 25 MINUTES!!!! I will never order from Domino's again!!! After this thought I immediately think to myself, I will be dead, so I will probably never order another pizza again. Right then, the cops come in. At gunpoint they calm her down and obtain the knife. Alejandro had shown up to the door wide open and saw psycho with the knife and went back to his 98 Honda Accord and called the cops. Domino's pizza literally saved my life. They should change the name from the pizza tracker to the savior tracker Alejandro is the true definition of a hero. In a way, Alejandro is the 5th ninja turtle. He showed up, accessed the situation, didnt panic, and saved my ass from the bad guys. Oh yeah, and he brought a fucking excellent pizza too. THIS IS THE MOST AWESOME THING I HAVE EVER READ POWER TO THE PIZZA MA THEMETAPICTURECOM srsfunny:Very Well Done Domino’s Pizza Tracker
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woh: Paul The Trombonist @JazzTrombonist I accidentally texted my wife with voice recognition...while playing the trombone oo AT&T Wi-Fi令 3:34 PM イ* 79% ·.ooo AT&T Wi-Fi令 3:36 PM Messages (3) Paul Det Messages (3) Paul iMessage Today 3:27 PM (1/5) Woo woo woo woo woo woo woo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo woo woo woo woo woo woo woO woo woo wOO wOo woO woo woO WOO woo woo w hoo w woop Totally! Ya, that makes sense. Call you soon Sounds good! (2/5) oo woo woo woo woo hoo woo hoo who who who who who who wu woo wo0 woo woop woop woop woop woo woop wah wah waa what wapp whapp woo woo woo perfect we should probably go grocery shopping later (3/5) woop woop wah wah wah woo woo woo wah woo wha waa waa woop woop woop wwop woop woop whap wah wah woh wa wa wa whh woo woo Delive (1/5) Woo woo woo woo woo woo woo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo woo woo woO wOO woo woo wo0 woo WOO wOO wOo woO WOO WOO wOO woo woo w hoo w woop (4/5) woop woop wah wah wah waaa waa waa waa waa waa waa waa woo woo woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop waa waa waa waa waaaaa waaa waaa waa (2/5) oo woo woo woo woo hoo woo hoo who who who who who who wu woo woo woo woop woop woop woop woo woop wah wah waa what wapp whapp woo woo woo (3/5) woop woop wah wah wah woo woo woo wah woo wha waa waa woop woop woop wwop woop woop whap (5/5) woop woop wah wah wah woo woo woo wah woo wha waa waa woop woop woop wwop woop woop whap wah wah woh wa wa wa whh woo woo Message Message
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