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Baked, Dad, and Fail: So my mom told me a story... theguilteaparty Growing up, my mom and her siblings would make banana bread every week Literally every week since the first one of them leamed how to make it, they started making banana bread- lo and behold though, they liked it with walnuts and they all knew their dad hated walnuts So they made a special loaf of banana bread just for him every week, just for him to eat Nobody else was allowed to eat it because that was his banana bread, baked especially for him So anyways, they did this once a week from middle school up until every last one of them moved out of the house (and considering there was at least 10 years difference from the oldest to the youngest, this was quite some time) So that's like... 16 years of weekly banana bread. And he always finished it He, without fail, ate the whole loaf of bread by himself That's approximately 835 loaves of banana bread. Now Skip ahead a few years and they're all visiting and baking banana bread and they start making a dad's bread and their mom comes in, "I don't think he can handle eating one more slice of banana breadl What are you talking about? He loves banana breadl He had it all the timel This is when my grandma, their mom, broke the news that my grandfather loathed banana bread with every fiber of his being, He just adored that his kids loved him enough to make him a special loaf of banana bread every week (and he didnt have the heart to tell them that he couldnt stand banana bread) and he was incredibly, utterly upset that my grandma tokd the kids his big secret My grandfather was a loving, patent, gentle man who absolutely hated banana bread but loved his kids so much more and I just wanted to share that with you guys. I think this story is just about the perfect example of the kind of person he was I’ve read this story a thousand times and it still makes me cry. I’m gonna go hug my grandparents via /r/wholesomememes http://bit.ly/2WZFNwz

I’ve read this story a thousand times and it still makes me cry. I’m gonna go hug my grandparents via /r/wholesomememes http://bit.ly/2WZFNw...

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Baked, Dad, and Fail: So my mom told me a story... theguilteaparty Growing up, my mom and her siblings would make banana bread every week Literally every week since the first one of them leamed how to make it, they started making banana bread- lo and behold though, they liked it with walnuts and they all knew their dad hated walnuts So they made a special loaf of banana bread just for him every week, just for him to eat Nobody else was allowed to eat it because that was his banana bread, baked especially for him So anyways, they did this once a week from middle school up until every last one of them moved out of the house (and considering there was at least 10 years difference from the oldest to the youngest, this was quite some time) So that's like... 16 years of weekly banana bread. And he always finished it He, without fail, ate the whole loaf of bread by himself That's approximately 835 loaves of banana bread. Now Skip ahead a few years and they're all visiting and baking banana bread and they start making a dad's bread and their mom comes in, "I don't think he can handle eating one more slice of banana breadl What are you talking about? He loves banana breadl He had it all the timel This is when my grandma, their mom, broke the news that my grandfather loathed banana bread with every fiber of his being, He just adored that his kids loved him enough to make him a special loaf of banana bread every week (and he didnt have the heart to tell them that he couldnt stand banana bread) and he was incredibly, utterly upset that my grandma tokd the kids his big secret My grandfather was a loving, patent, gentle man who absolutely hated banana bread but loved his kids so much more and I just wanted to share that with you guys. I think this story is just about the perfect example of the kind of person he was I’ve read this story a thousand times and it still makes me cry. I’m gonna go hug my grandparents

I’ve read this story a thousand times and it still makes me cry. I’m gonna go hug my grandparents

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Alive, Beard, and Children: feniczoroark: minority-cubed: princemetalthunder: skrill-cosby: drucila616: How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?WITNESS: My name is Susan!_______________________________ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?WITNESS: No, I just lie there.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?WITNESS: July 18th.ATTORNEY: What year?WITNESS: Every year._____________________________________ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?WITNESS: Forty-five years._________________________________ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?WITNESS: I forget..ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?____________________________________ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?WITNESS: Are you shitting me?_________________________________________ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?WITNESS: Getting laid____________________________________________ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: How many were boys?WITNESS: None.ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?____________________________________________ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?WITNESS: By death..ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?WITNESS: Take a guess.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beardATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male._____________________________________ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.______________________________________ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight._________________________________________ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?WITNESS: Oral…_________________________________________ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PMATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?______________________________________And last:ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?WITNESS: No..ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law. oh my god these are great fuck this is like reading a jokes and not actual quotes The last one is how I feel about all my schoolmates I can feel the frustration
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Beautiful, Cars, and Friday: When gunman advanced on New Zealand mosque, this man ran at him Abdul Aziz, 48, is being hailed as a hero for preventing more deaths The Associated Press Posted: Mar 16, 2019 6:54 AM ET Last Updated: an hour ago Abdul Aziz, 48, is being hailed as a hero for preventing more deaths during Friday prayers at the Linwood mosque in Christchurch. (Vincent Thian/Associated Press) solacekames: When the gunman advanced toward the mosque, killing those in his path, Abdul Aziz didn’t hide. Instead, he picked up the first thing he could find, a credit card machine, and ran outside screaming “Come here!” Aziz, 48, is being hailed as a hero for preventing more deaths during Friday prayers at the Linwood mosque in Christchurch after leading the gunman in a cat-and-mouse chase before scaring him into speeding away in his car. But Aziz, whose four sons and dozens of others remained in the mosque while he faced off with the gunman, said he thinks it’s what anyone would have done. The gunman killed 49 people after attacking two mosques in the deadliest mass shooting in New Zealand’s modern history. […] He said he could hear his two youngest sons, aged 11 and 5, urging him to come back inside. The gunman returned, firing. Aziz said he ran, weaving through cars parked in the driveway, which prevented the gunman from getting a clean shot. Then Aziz spotted a gun the gunman had abandoned and picked it up, pointed it and squeezed the trigger. It was empty. He said the gunman ran back to the car for a second time, likely to grab yet another weapon. “He gets into his car and I just got the gun and threw it on his window like an arrow and blasted his window,” he said. The windshield shattered: “That’s why he got scared.” He said the gunman was cursing at him, yelling that he was going to kill them all. But he drove away and Aziz said he chased the car down the street to a red light, before it made a U-turn and sped away. Online videos indicate police officers managed to force the car from the road and drag out the suspect soon after. Originally from Kabul, Afghanistan, Aziz said he left as a refugee when he was a boy and lived for more than 25 years in Australia before moving to New Zealand a couple of years ago.“I’ve been to a lot of countries and this is one of the beautiful ones,” he said. And, he always thought, a peaceful one as well. Aziz said he didn’t feel fear or much of anything when facing the gunman. It was like he was on autopilot. And he believes that Allah didn’t think it was his time to die.

solacekames: When the gunman advanced toward the mosque, killing those in his path, Abdul Aziz didn’t hide. Instead, he picked up the first ...

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Being Alone, Bando, and Bodies : Pammo @pammoer He was only 14 years old when he was executed in an electric chair. 5,380 volt to the head!! And 70 fuckin years later he was proven innocent. Rest in peace lil one May his innocent soul rest in peace. George Stinney Jr of African descent was the youngest person to be sentenced to death in the 20th century in the United States. He was only 14 years old when he was executed in an electric chair. During his trial, even on the day of his execution, he always carried a bible in his hands, claiming to be innocent. He was accused of killing two white girls, 11-Year-old Betty, and Mary of 7, the bodies were found near the house where the teenager resided with his parents. At that time, all members of the jury were white. The trial lasted only 2 hours, and the sentence was dictated 10 minutes later The Boy's parents were threatened, and prevented from being present in the courtroom, and subsequently expelled from that city. Before the execution, George spent 81 days in prison without being able to see his parents. He was held in solitary, 80 miles from his city. He was heard alone without the presence of his parents or a lawyer He was electrocuted with 5,380 volts in his head, imagine all that voltage in a teenager's head. 70 years later, his innocence was finally proven by a judge in South Carolina. The boy was innocent, someone set it up to blame him for being black. Lippy Lickshot '@FatherLippy No matter how far I go in life I will always feel a sense of rage due to how my people have been treated over time. It's fuckin disgusting Pammo @pammoer He was only 14 years old when he was executed in an electric chair. 5,380 volt to the head!! And 70 fuckin years later he was proven innocent. Rest irn May his innocent soul rest in peace. electric chair. During his trial, even on the day of his execution, he always carried a bible in his hands, claiming to bee innocent. He was accused of killing two white girls, 11-Year-old Betty, and Mary of 7, the bodies were found near the house where the teenager resided with his parents. At that time, all members of the jury were white. The trial lasted only 2 hours, and the sentence was dictated 10 minutes later. The Boy's parents were threatened, and prevented from being present in the courtroom, and subsequently expelled from that city Before the execution, George spent 81 days in prison without being able to see his parents. He was held in solitary, 80 miles from his city. He was heard alone without the presence of his parents or a lawyer He was electrocuted with 5,380 volts in his head, imagine all that voltage in a teenager's head 70 years later, his innocence was finally proven by a judge in South Carolina. The boy was innocent someone set it up to blame him for being black. 3:05 AM Oct 24, 2018 7.3K Retweets 13,5K Likes bando–grand-scamyon: stevviefox: endangered-justice-seeker: This is painful. I have no words.. And people say monsters aren’t real. But scooby doo taught us who the real monsters actually are but you know.
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Ass, Bones, and Children: HICKS, Sybil Marie (nee Lyons) It hurts me to admit it... but , Mrs. Ron Hicks from Baysville, have passed away. I passed peacefully with my eldest daughter, Brenda, by my side February 2, 2019 at 8:20 a.m. I leave behind my loving husband, Ron Hicks, whom I often affectionately referred to as a "Horse's Ass". I also left behind my children whom I tolerated over the years; Bob (with Carol) my oldest son and also my favourite. Brian (with Ginette) who was the Oreo cookie favourite, Brenda AKA "Hazel" who would run to clean the bathrooms when she heard company was coming. Barbara (with Gordon) the ever Miss Perfect and finally Baby Bruce who wouldn't eat homemade turkey soup because he didn't want to be alert looking for bones while he ate. I will miss seeing my sweetest grandchildren; Caitlin, Megan, Joel, Issac Mason, Rachel, Annie, Emma, Harrison, Clark, Choe, Orion, Griffin ...grow up to be the incredible people they are meant to be I graduated from Waterdown High School with honors while wearing my shiny bright saddle shoes. I later graduated from Hamilton General Hospital School Nursing class of 1957B -Best Class EVER! In 1972 Ron and I loaded the car with the 5- B's and headed north to run a school bus company for over 20 years in Baysville, Ontario. I was an active horticulturalist, a member of the Eastern Star and a member of the Lion's Club in Baysville. I finally have the smoking hot body I have always wanted... . having been cremated. Please come say goodbye and celebrate my wonderful life with my husband and his special friend Dorothy who is now lovingly taking care of my horse's ass For those of you who are wondering who assisted me in writing this. it wasn't my husband, it wasn't my oldest, nor was it my youngest... Thank you all for sharing my life with me. I am off to swim to the buoy and back Love, Sybil This womans obituary (Hamilton Spectator) proves that in death, she is funnier than I am in life
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Ass, Bones, and Children: HICKS, Sybil Marie (nee Lyons) It hurts me to admit it... but , Mrs. Ron Hicks from Baysville, have passed away. I passed peacefully with my eldest daughter, Brenda, by my side February 2, 2019 at 8:20 a.m. I leave behind my loving husband, Ron Hicks, whom I often affectionately referred to as a "Horse's Ass". I also left behind my children whom I tolerated over the years; Bob (with Carol) my oldest son and also my favourite. Brian (with Ginette) who was the Oreo cookie favourite, Brenda AKA "Hazel" who would run to clean the bathrooms when she heard company was coming. Barbara (with Gordon) the ever Miss Perfect and finally Baby Bruce who wouldn't eat homemade turkey soup because he didn't want to be alert looking for bones while he ate. I will miss seeing my sweetest grandchildren; Caitlin, Megan, Joel, Issac Mason, Rachel, Annie, Emma, Harrison, Clark, Choe, Orion, Griffin ...grow up to be the incredible people they are meant to be I graduated from Waterdown High School with honors while wearing my shiny bright saddle shoes. I later graduated from Hamilton General Hospital School Nursing class of 1957B -Best Class EVER! In 1972 Ron and I loaded the car with the 5- B's and headed north to run a school bus company for over 20 years in Baysville, Ontario. I was an active horticulturalist, a member of the Eastern Star and a member of the Lion's Club in Baysville. I finally have the smoking hot body I have always wanted... . having been cremated. Please come say goodbye and celebrate my wonderful life with my husband and his special friend Dorothy who is now lovingly taking care of my horse's ass For those of you who are wondering who assisted me in writing this. it wasn't my husband, it wasn't my oldest, nor was it my youngest... Thank you all for sharing my life with me. I am off to swim to the buoy and back Love, Sybil This womans obituary (Hamilton Spectator) proves that in death, she is funnier than I am in life
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Ass, Bones, and Children: HICKS, Sybil Marie (nee Lyons) It hurts me to admit it... but , Mrs. Ron Hicks from Baysville, have passed away. I passed peacefully with my eldest daughter, Brenda, by my side February 2, 2019 at 8:20 a.m. I leave behind my loving husband, Ron Hicks, whom I often affectionately referred to as a "Horse's Ass". I also left behind my children whom I tolerated over the years; Bob (with Carol) my oldest son and also my favourite. Brian (with Ginette) who was the Oreo cookie favourite, Brenda AKA "Hazel" who would run to clean the bathrooms when she heard company was coming. Barbara (with Gordon) the ever Miss Perfect and finally Baby Bruce who wouldn't eat homemade turkey soup because he didn't want to be alert looking for bones while he ate. I will miss seeing my sweetest grandchildren; Caitlin, Megan, Joel, Issac Mason, Rachel, Annie, Emma, Harrison, Clark, Choe, Orion, Griffin ...grow up to be the incredible people they are meant to be I graduated from Waterdown High School with honors while wearing my shiny bright saddle shoes. I later graduated from Hamilton General Hospital School Nursing class of 1957B -Best Class EVER! In 1972 Ron and I loaded the car with the 5- B's and headed north to run a school bus company for over 20 years in Baysville, Ontario. I was an active horticulturalist, a member of the Eastern Star and a member of the Lion's Club in Baysville. I finally have the smoking hot body I have always wanted... . having been cremated. Please come say goodbye and celebrate my wonderful life with my husband and his special friend Dorothy who is now lovingly taking care of my horse's ass For those of you who are wondering who assisted me in writing this. it wasn't my husband, it wasn't my oldest, nor was it my youngest... Thank you all for sharing my life with me. I am off to swim to the buoy and back Love, Sybil This womans obituary (Hamilton Spectator) proves that in death, she is funnier than I am in life
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